Home page of BPDFamily.com, online relationship supportMember registration here
July 09, 2025, 07:08:01 PM *
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins: Kells76, Once Removed, Turkish
Senior Ambassadors: SinisterComplex
  Help!   Boards   Please Donate Login to Post New?--Click here to register  
bing
Popular books with members
103
Surviving a
Borderline Parent

Emotional Blackmail
Fear, Obligation, and Guilt
When Parents Make
Children Their Partners
Healing the
Shame That Binds You


Pages: [1]   Go Down
  Print  
Author Topic: I heard from both my parents this weekend  (Read 689 times)
unicorn2014
********
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Divorced
Posts: 2574



« on: May 31, 2016, 06:53:43 PM »

My dad emailed me twice, sent me a picture of a painting and its description as well as the story of their visit to the museum and then he sent me a family photo of their wedding, of which I was present at.

My mother's card came as a surprise. When I opened it it turned out to have the $100 my dad said he would give me until August along with "get a job".

It is highly ironic that my grandmother was 100 times more kinder then my mother and my mother vilified her. My grandmother having been married and divorced three times knew the hardships of single parenthood and never once judged me for needing financial help after my divorce. If I didn't need the money I would send the check back but I do need the money, that was the whole problem in the first place, my grandmother's money had gone into figuring out my rent and when I lost it due to the lawsuit my rent was not adjusted accordingly.

I invited my mom to meet me at the museum this Thursday for a lecture, just like I invited my dad, but they both ignored me.

My parents are NOT good for my self esteem AT ALL.

My mother thinks I was supposed to raise my self and find my own way to happy and rewarding career and that my daughter is supposed to raise herself.

I've learned not to even respond to her provocation but it still hurts. It hurts knowing there's nothing I can do to change her but i get it now, I accept it, I've stopped fighting, I've given up.

I feel sad.

Logged
Please help
****
Offline Offline

Posts: 270


« Reply #1 on: May 31, 2016, 08:26:49 PM »

Your parents are trying to hurt you for whatever reason.
Logged
unicorn2014
********
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Divorced
Posts: 2574



« Reply #2 on: May 31, 2016, 08:33:39 PM »

Your parents are trying to hurt you for whatever reason.

I don't think my father is trying to hurt me, I think my mother is and I know why. My partner  tried to help me by telling my father about my ptsd  and while that did result in me getting money to pay for my dental bill because he appealed to his narcissism   it also resulted in me getting humiliated by my mother yet again. My mother is very manipulative. Basically she  is telling me that I don't have a right to exist and that I should have raised myself and since I didn't whatever happened to me is my fault not hers. That couldn't be farther from the truth. They abandoned me as an adolescent and they blame me for not being able to make it on my own from there to a high powered career in whatever interested me. They expect me to abandon my teenage daughter the same way they abandoned me. I can't even talk to them about the latest and greatest with her, whether good or bad, they're not interested.
Logged
Turkish
BOARD ADMINISTRATOR
**
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Other
Relationship status: "Divorced"/abandoned by SO in Feb 2014; Mother with BPD, PTSD, Depression and Anxiety: RIP in 2021.
Posts: 12183


Dad to my wolf pack


« Reply #3 on: May 31, 2016, 11:36:39 PM »

Ah, I may have read it the wrong way when I saw your post earlier. So the writing was your mother's?
Logged

    “For the strength of the Pack is the Wolf, and the strength of the Wolf is the Pack.” ― Rudyard Kipling
unicorn2014
********
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Divorced
Posts: 2574



« Reply #4 on: May 31, 2016, 11:56:07 PM »

Ah, I may have read it the wrong way when I saw your post earlier. So the writing was your mother's?

I apologize, my father emailed me twice, and my mother, whom I had blocked on my phone, sent me a card. I was not expecting that. Then when I opened it up I realized she had ironically taken over my grandmother's duty which is quite twisted as she never liked my grandmother. I was expecting my father to send me a check from his mother. I am quite irritated my mother is the one who did it but I have not said a word to her about that. I simply thanked her and invited her to the museum this week. I'm still annoyed and I got the mail hours ago. I don't like sitting and spinning. I unblocked her to thank her and she responded IMMEDIATELY which I thought was also odd because sometimes it takes her a day to respond and other times she ignores me. I'd really like to give my mother a piece of my mind right now but I've learned not to do that.
Logged
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?

Pages: [1]   Go Up
  Print  
 
Jump to:  

Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife



Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.21 | SMF © 2006-2020, Simple Machines Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!