threatening with announcements - do they follow through?

[Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.]

Dear all,
I feel, I´m still in between the „Conflicted/Decided“ or „Detaching/Healing wounds“ categories of that message board - and don´t know, which one I belong to… two years ago my UexBPD GF threatened me with announcements, that she will false accuse me at the police for sexual violence, another time for domestic violence concerning her, another time for that I hit her daughter… which all of course was not true… since then we had sporadic contacts but never get intimate again because I was too much afraid because of the threats… she said, she only did the threat announcements to give to me the same amount of hurt, that I gave her with my „bad behavior", and that she would never ever realize the announcements… I´m still unsure, whether I should get closer again, because there is still love between us… on the other hand, I don´t want to test, if she will follow through in a rage her announcements of a false accusation one day… Any experiences with that or advices? Thanks a lot... .

[Walkabout73]

Dear all,
I feel, I´m still in between the „Conflicted/Decided“ or „Detaching/Healing wounds“ categories of that message board - and don´t know, which one I belong to… two years ago my UexBPD GF threatened me with announcements, that she will false accuse me at the police for sexual violence, another time for domestic violence concerning her, another time for that I hit her daughter… which all of course was not true… since then we had sporadic contacts but never get intimate again because I was too much afraid because of the threats… she said, she only did the threat announcements to give to me the same amount of hurt, that I gave her with my „bad behavior", and that she would never ever realize the announcements… I´m still unsure, whether I should get closer again, because there is still love between us… on the other hand, I don´t want to test, if she will follow through in a rage her announcements of a false accusation one day… Any experiences with that or advices? Thanks a lot... .

[Lucky Jim]

Hey Walkabout, A person suffering from BPD usually uses threats as a way to manipulate the Non.  Manipulation is generally a three pronged approach, known as the F-O-G (fear, obligation and guilt).  I suggest you do what you deem necessary to protect yourself from her a filing false report, e.g., perhaps by documenting her threats in a summary you can give the Police.  Why you would contemplate jumping back into the toxic BPD soup is beyond me, but there is an addictive quality to a BPD r/s which may be affecting you.

LuckyJim