Finally confronted her

[Goodpal]

I've been w/ my untreated BPD partner on and off for 5 years now. For those 5 years she has never split on me but I'm thinking that may finally be happening.I've been the stereotypical nice guy in all of my relationships, including this one and I'm finally learning.

I have discovered that due to experiences I had in childhood I never learned to trust and stand by my own intuitions. I've always believed my partner to be a heavy drinker. Every time I am with her she is drinking. Every time we go somewhere she needs to have a drink beforehand and during the event, and after. This has gotten very annoying and quite limiting for obvious reasons.

Since we've been together she has consistently complained about being tired all of the time and feeling sick. We have had to cancel things because of this. This past winter was pretty much an indoor Netflix and drink fest because she was too ill to do anything. We're talking an average of 2 bottles of wine per day.

I finally got to the end of my rope with this and confronted her simply stating that she may need to change her habits of she ever wants to feel good again. This brought on a tyraid of anger that went way beyond what would be considered normal imo. She ended the conversation stating that she finally sees the real me.

Now my intuition believes she has a major alcohol problem and is in denial. I know I can't do anything to change that or her BPD but it is a nice feeling to state what you really think about something and not just ignore it or sweep it under the rug. There were a few times that I went over some of the things she said and started to feel like I did something wrong. I had to remind myself that what I did was not wrong. I am now even considering going further and stating that I did not appreciate that level anger I received and that it was completely uncalled for. In other words, I'm finally learning to be true to myself and to others. No more walking on eggshells.