She would not quit until my bank account was empty...

[Depression = 72% of members]

My 10 year marriage to my BPD wife is ending because I confronted her about loans that were hidden from me for 9 months.  I found out about them when the finance company called about a bounced check she wrote from her account.  I kept our finances separate for the entire marriage because she was very uncontrolled with her spending.   She expected me to bail her out financially of the mess she created all by herself without my knowledge.  I refused (This was not the first time and broke an agreement we had about borrowing money)  Additionally after getting everything together for the accountant to do taxes I realized she spent $17K last year between multiple sources about 1/3 of it gifts from me.  There is nothing to show for the money spent last year and she contributed nothing to our household expenses since it was "Not her Job" to do that.  I paid all the household expenses including her car, gas, medical expenses etc.  So when I confronted her about the $17K I was told I was a loser husband since I could not provide to her expectations.  Only 6 weeks ago she told me she just wanted more of my time and did not care if we were broke she would still love me... .Really?  Which of these statements is true? Actions speak louder than false words ---> Its all about the money  All I can say is run away as far and as fast as you can.  She will not quit until your bank account is empty and you have a huge financial mess to clean up, she will then move on to the next one leaving you head spinning trying to understand what exactly happened.  BPDs can spend lots of money on nothing faster than anything I can imagine.  

[scrayvic]

My 10 year marriage to my BPD wife is ending because I confronted her about loans that were hidden from me for 9 months.  I found out about them when the finance company called about a bounced check she wrote from her account.  I kept our finances separate for the entire marriage because she was very uncontrolled with her spending.   She expected me to bail her out financially of the mess she created all by herself without my knowledge.  I refused (This was not the first time and broke an agreement we had about borrowing money)  Additionally after getting everything together for the accountant to do taxes I realized she spent $17K last year between multiple sources about 1/3 of it gifts from me.  There is nothing to show for the money spent last year and she contributed nothing to our household expenses since it was "Not her Job" to do that.  I paid all the household expenses including her car, gas, medical expenses etc.  So when I confronted her about the $17K I was told I was a loser husband since I could not provide to her expectations.  Only 6 weeks ago she told me she just wanted more of my time and did not care if we were broke she would still love me... .Really?  Which of these statements is true? Actions speak louder than false words ---> Its all about the money  All I can say is run away as far and as fast as you can.  She will not quit until your bank account is empty and you have a huge financial mess to clean up, she will then move on to the next one leaving you head spinning trying to understand what exactly happened.  BPDs can spend lots of money on nothing faster than anything I can imagine.  

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So when I confronted her about the $17K I was told I was a loser husband since I could not provide to her expectations.

Wow, what a story.

How are you going to handle this, financially?