Daughter lucky recipient of his verbal tirade

[Happy outside]

After I had gone to bed, husband went off on daughter on what a horrible person she is. That if she doesn't change, she will be a defensive person just like her mother; me. That she is a manipulator and will be a bad spouse someday.

I had no idea that this had occurred till this afternoon. I tried to console my daughter letting her know that it was all untrue. This was unprovoked and I was surprised that he would say this to her. This is usually the normal speech that I hear.

Do I confront him and open that HUGE can of worms?

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[Mutt]

Hi Happy outside,



I'm sorry that D went through, what a horrible thing for a child to hear from a parent. A pwBPD have a difficult time seeing the world or people in it as integrated whole, you're all good or all bad, it sounds like you're both split black. Have you seen him split your D black in the past? If so, how long does it usually last? I usually don't confront my ex because I don't want to be split black, her D, my ex SD was split black, I think because her and I ( SD ) used to confront my ex it would trigger stress and anxiety and splitting protects her ego.

[Happy outside]

I reminder her that he really does love her and would do anything for her.
He has always been harder on her and more lenient with her brother.
He has no respect for me and I'm starting to think women in general.
Daughter comes home from college only when she has to and I'm pretty sure this will be her last summer here.
He says that the kids don't like me, when it's really him they don't like.

But the crazy thing is, he will drop everything to help his kids.