Introduction

[Babybear]

I am 51 years old with a 4 year daughter. My mother and I have been nc for 1 1/2 now.  We stopped talking because she interfering with our parenting and having angry outbursts in front of my daughter.  Recently, my mother called out of the blue and asked me if I would go to Family Therapy with her.  I agreed.  We get through the 1st session but after the next it was over.  My mother decided she did not want to continue.  My heart is heavy with sadness but I know it's best for me
and my immediate family.  Thanks for listening.

[Turkish]

Hello Babybear,

It sounds like you did what was best to protect your child. I went NC with my mother for almost a year now,  1.5 years in-person contact. She accusing me of stealing from her was one thing,  but accusing my kids,  then 4 and 6, was another.  She is more of the quiet depressive type,  so I didn't have to deal with the outbursts you seem to have. 

When I was 12, my mother took us to family therapy.  She abandoned me after one joint session.  I was the problem,  naturally. 

What kinds of outbursts was she doing on front of your daughter?

T

[Alastor]

Hi Babybear, I’m sorry to hear that. I’m amazed you got her through the door into therapy in the first place and I’m sorry it didn’t stick.

Personally I had to set a clear boundary with my BPDm: no contact with her grandchildren unless she is in therapy for BPD. Past threats of calling child services because of my “abuse” (? she left the accusation rather vague... .), rages, etc. Forget it. Sure I’d like my child to know the good side of his grandmother, but BPD rages scare the hell out of me, and I don’t want to expose my little munchkin to what I endured growing up.

As you said, sadness but we know what’s best.