starting to focus on helping myself

[krisk]

Hi BPD family! I am so happy to hear that there is a place for me to obtain support as I begin to work towards improving my own life despite the challenges of dealing with my BPD mother. Thank you in advance for your support. I recently began therapy and knew that I needed help after my mother began to impact my relationship with my husband.

[Panda39]

Hi krisk,

Welcome to the BPD Family!   Glad you decided to jump in and post.

Great job getting started in therapy it can be really helpful negotiating life with a BPDmom or BPD anybody in your life. 

I'm here because my significant other (SO) has an undiagnosed BPD ex-wife and they share 2 daughters.  This site has been really helpful for me in terms of how I interact with my SO's daughters in relation to their mother.

There is a lot of information, tools, and members who "get it".

What would you say is the biggest issue you have with your mother? Maybe we can help?

Panda39

[Harri]

Hi krisk and welcome!

I'm so glad you found us though I am sorry for the circumstances that brought you here. 

As Panda said, there are a lot of articles and tools we can refer you to as you begin to learn your way around the site.  A good place to start is to look over on the right hand side of the page to the Survivors Guide.  Each item on the list is clickable and will expand to give you more information.  I am not sure where you are in therapy but you may find the information helpful.  Another place to go is towards the top of the page to the three topics stickied called Building a Better Life Around a BPD Mother or Father, Lessons, and Suggested Reading.   Several links are listed under each title so see what might be most important for you.  This site is huge though and there are many other articles as well.

Anyway, roam around, read, post and feel free to ask questions.  All of us here can relate to having a family member with BPD/mental illness.  Many members are also working with spouses to establish boundaries and develop communication strategies to use as a couple.  When you can, tell us more of your situation and how your mom is affecting your relationship with your husband.

Hope to see you around!

[Turkish]

How is your mother impacting your marriage? We have many members in the same situation and a lot of wisdom collectively in setting boundaries in general with disordered family members.  I hope to hear more so we can best support you!