My adult child is causing havoc in the home

[Myheart]

I have an adult child with BPD who is raising havoc in our home. How do I ask them to leave without causing him to feel unloved ?

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Feeling Better]

Hello Myheart 

Welcome to the son/daughter board.

You say that your adult child is raising havoc in your home and you want to ask him to leave, so his behaviour is obviously unacceptable to you and that is ok, you have a right to have some peace in your own home.

I haven’t had to ask an adult child of mine to leave but I do know that others who post here have. I think that it’s best to do it in a loving and supportive way without laying any blame, let him know that you love him and will always be there for him.

Does he have somewhere he can go when you ask him to leave? 

[Kwamina]

Hi Myheart and welcome to bpdfamily

In what ways is your adult child with BPD causing havoc in your home? Do you feel safe with him around?

You are asking how to ask him to leave without him feeling unloved. People with BPD are often indeed quite sensitive to perceived slights and rejections and often have a deep fear of abandonment. Does he live with you?

How long has this behavior been going on and has your child been officially diagnosed with BPD?

Take care

The Board Parrot