Accused of using my father's death to hijack thanksgiving

[formflier]

The dysregulations come out of nowhere.

Brief history:  My Father passed away last December... .this is first Thanksgiving without him.

Of course I was counting my blessing this morning and considering life... .so I was very emotional.  I expressed to my wife that I was very thankful for her and my family... .we were snuggling in bed.

At some point I was asking my wife what the right thing was to do about my Mom today... .if we should invite her over for a meal or if I should go spend time with her alone.  I was honestly asking the question... .as I have no idea which of those options I would be most likely to get through... .again... .very emotional for me.  I'm sure it's emotional for my Mom.  I'm sure my wife has feelings about it as well.

She said we should bring my Mom over here.  Then she asked if I would mind if she invited her parents over as well.    I thought for a while and said I didn't think I would be able to get through that emotionally... .that I understood if she wanted to go over to their house... .and spend time with them.  That I supported that.

I let her know that my "real" desire was to spend time with just her and kids... .our family.  That I was struggling with what the right thing to do with/about my Mom ... .and now wasn't a good time to add in additional emotional stress.

She said"  Well... then to avoid the stress just agree to have your Mom and my parents over. 

I said "I'm not able to do that... "

Then she started rewriting the conversation... you said this so it means that... .I started to protest her twisting my words and meaning... .and realized it was time to exit the conversation and the room.  As I was getting dressed to leave... .she said "I can't believe you are USING your Dad to hijack Thanksgiving... ."

of course it hooked me... .

"FFw... .I was hoping you would help me work through my emotions about my thanksgiving and my Father not being here.  You are not God... .you don't know what I'm thinking and feeling and it's disgusting that you are twisting my words... .knowing that I'm telling you that you understand me wrong.  I won't be part of this... ."  and left the room.

She stayed in the room and talked loudly for a long time.  Thankfully I really couldn't make out much of what she said.

She eventually quit talking... .and is not puttering around the kitchen getting things ready (I guess).

My plan is to try and take my Mom out for dinner alone.  I'll be around for the planned family dinner. 

If her parents show... .I won't share a meal with them.  I'm not going to make a scene with yelling and screaming... .but I'm NOT a pretender... .and I won't by into a way of healing things in a family that basically says "act like everything is ok... .even though nothing has been solved".

See other thread about breaking FOO patterns... .

People can think what they want about it... .I won't be part of it...

FF

[Notwendy]

It makes sense to have your mom over if she is alone for Thanksgiving. Your wife's mom is not alone. Also one extra guest is easier to accommodate.

No doubt your request triggered some kind of "I have to have my family too" thing. My H has all kinds of feelings of obligation to his FOO, and I do too so these are easily triggered.

The comment about your Dad was crazy and she may have been clueless of the impact on you.

I see two errors here: what you said to her about hoping she'd help you work through your feelings about your Dad on this day. PwBPD can't even manage her own feelings.

The other is bringing up your Dad at all. You are still emotionally raw about the topic, probably will be for a long time. You didn't do anything wrong about talking about it. The error is bringing up a difficult topic with someone who can not manage emotions, not hers, not yours.

These comments come from being in that grief situation about my father and discussions with BPD mom. She's clueless about my feelings. She can't even manage her own. When I get emotional, she gets triggered. Also when she is dysregulating she says really mean things to me about my father when she wants to hurt back. Finally, I set a boundary with her: I do not discuss my father with her. I don't bring it up and if she brings it up, I don't discuss him with her. My reasons: it is something that is very difficult to manage emotionally and I can't have that kind of discussion with someone with BPD.

That also includes not spending a holiday with her parents when you are feeling emotional . Take  care of yourself FF!

[formflier]

I just got back from lunch with my Mom.  Really enjoyable time.  We are doing a long cooking roast at home... so it will be several more hours before it's ready.

I'll go do something else with Mom later... but I haven't invited her to eat.

Should my wife's parents show up... .I'll excuse myself and hopefully not say something too damaging... .but I'm NOT going to be part of "Oh... it's the holidays... we'll all heal... poof... magic"

I haven't spoken to her parents or extended family in over two years... getting close to three.

I've let them know I'm open to ethical... board certified mental health professionals helping work through issues.  But I don't demand it.

That's the pathway to a relationship... should they want want.  I won't pretend otherwise.

I was doing a long snuggle with my wife this morning (something that seems to help stabilize things... .) and as I was letting my mind wander... .I began to get emotional.  My wife asked what was up... .and I started to share.

Not trying to JADE or justify what I did... .once I realized BPD had taken over... I exited.

When the subject of my Dad comes up... .I've been batting about 50/50 on it going well.  So... .in an odd way, it would be easier if my wife was not as high functioning.

Anyway... .Happy Thanksgiving!  Thanks so much for the response and thoughtful (and accurate) assessment.

Gotta run get something from the store... .I may come back and share more thoughts later.  I'm so glad to have you guys to chat with... .that you get it... .and can "see through" things to a pathway forward.

FF

[Cat Familiar]

So sorry, FF.     I'm glad you had a nice lunch with your mother.

It's so tempting when things are going well, to believe that our BPD loved ones can support us emotionally, as we would them.
And occasionally they can. But it's walking a razor's edge and so easy to say something that causes them to deflect instantly from our pain and our needs, like a lightning strike, to their own feelings of sorrow and victimhood.

   Cat

[formflier]

I had a good lunch with Mom.  And a great Thanksgiving meal with "just" my family.  Nobody else was "imposed".

Now... .I'm laying down working on a food coma.

Sometime later today I'll probably go do something with Mom again... .perhaps drag a few kids along.

Yeah... I really didn't think before I started sharing.  It sucks... but I suppose I did pretty good disengaging when I did and moving on with life. 

There isn't any solving these things... .so my goal is to "starve the fire" of any more fuel.

Sigh... .

We did prime rib roast... .wow... .it was wonderful.

FF

[SweetCharlotte]

I'm glad you had a good Thanksgiving meal, despite being pushed and pulled in different directions. I am sorry to hear that you lost your Dad within the last 12 months, FF. At least you still have your Mom. It's good that you spent time with her today. I hope that she has been dealing well with her grief and is in good health.

[I Am Redeemed]

Happy Thanksgiving FF,

I am sorry for your loss, the first holiday season after losing a loved one is rough. This was the first Thanksgiving that neither of my parents have been with us (Dad passed Sept of 2014 and Mom passed just this last April) so I understand your emotional state. The grief can be acutely present on holidays and special occasions, and it is natural for you to want to share your thoughts about it with someone you love. It must have been very frustrating and disappointing when that vulnerable moment turned back and bit you.

I see the point about her being triggered by the possibility of your mom visiting... .but you asked her opinion on whether you should visit your mom or invite her over. Perhaps she suggested inviting your mom and immediately felt obligated to invite her parents. I think possibly the comment about you using your dad's passing was projection... .she tried to use the invitation for your mom to justify an invitation for her parents... .thereby "hijacking" Thanksgiving, which was originally going to be just you, her and kids. So she attributed that to you.
 
Whether that's true or not... .still that comment was SO not cool. It implied that you were either exaggerating your grief over your dad, or at the least taking advantage of it to manipulate a situation. False and ridiculous accusation, and boy, do I know how that feels. It sucks.

Good job disengaging. I'm sorry you couldn't find the emotional support you needed in such a tough situation
   

Redeemed

P.S. Prime rib is freaking awesome 

[Notwendy]

I'm glad you had a nice time with your mother.

It may help to recognize that for you, these holidays are going to be understandably emotional. It's hard to lose a parent. I've found that if I am emotional about anything, it affects the dynamics in my relationship. Now that Thanksgiving has passed, think about how you can include some self care and time with your mother over Christmas, which is likely going to be emotional for both of you.

Holidays and including family is a potential trigger for both of you. For us it is a big one as well. Deciding on time with each family is ground for potential misunderstanding and arguments between us. I'd be willing to bet your wife gets triggered by some of her FOG as well. You bringing your mother over while you dislike her parents is surely one of those triggers. What she said was insensitive but it could have been her own triggered projection. I'm not excusing this, but being aware of the holiday/family difficulties might help you navigate Christmas.

[formflier]

P.S. Prime rib is freaking awesome 

Yes it is! 

We tend to be pretty adventurous with food (to the chagrin of D7).  D7 decided that mashed potatoes was all she needed yesterday.  We've had to learn not to get in power struggles with her... .she does seem to have lots of sensitivities and slowly seems to be growing out of it.

A few years back we had lobsters for thanksgiving.   As in went and got them... had them crawling around the kitchen floor for a while and then... ."alright boys... .everyone in the pot... . "

At the time D4 or 5 ... .(can't remember exactly) was about to come unglued that we could eat such things...

My wife wanted to be cuddly for a while this morning... she hasn't brought up anything about yesterday... .I don't plan on it.

Yes I'm very lucky to have Mom and that she is healthy.  The "good genes" come from that side.  My grandmother (Mom's mom) died "young" at 96 and several of her sisters lived over a 100. 

I've got plenty of grandkids to keep Mom busy.

Yeah... .it hurt to know that she (FFw) would "ask about my feelings... what was wrong" and then flip it.  I agree the holidays will likely be interesting... .I plan on disengaging quickly from drama.

FF

[Red5]

Morning Formflier!

Sorry about what happened yesterday... .but looks like everything turned out alright, you are always "good under stress"!... ."quick on your feet"!... .
Salute !

I was counting my blessing this morning and considering life... .so I was very emotional.

Man, I learned a very long time ago, that in my own relationship/marriage... .that when it comes to my own inner emotions, .that I'm on my own... .if I were to seek her comfort, "share" my emotions... .seek  her advice, her comfort, or anything of the kind ie' "just hold me, I need you,"... .ie' being emotional... .that I'd be instantly flogged for my fragility , and perceived weakness... .

*This speaks volumes in regards to my uBPDw's "inner wounded child"... .thanks foo!... .thanks alot ; (

I think that pw/BPD depends on the caretaker "Non" to always "be strong"... .if the Non slips, and squirts a few tears, or else acts sad... then the beatings will increase and continue until the Non's morale improves... .so to speak,

So I just don't... .most times anyways... .but case in point... .her beloved Yorkie passed yesterday was a week ago... .it was horrible... .we (I) loved that little dog... .and I cried like a little baby... .I held nothing back... .it was pure anguish... .you see, I displayed my honest emotions... .my weakness, my bitter sadness... my helplessness in the situation... .never mind that I loaded her and her puppy up in the Jeep, still in our pajamas and night coat and gowns... .turned on the flashers, and ran several red-lights, cut through the bank parking lot... .speeding... .trying to get down town to the vets office, thirty minutes before they even opened, in a vain attempt to save her life... .nope!... .

She called up foo mum, and released her from the split black jail... and shoved me in there... .I was ~> out!... .and foo mum was in<~... .just like that, and less than twenty four hours later, was the final "acting out"... .

I think you did good in your situation yesterday morning FF, as you always do... .I know your struggles from all your posts here, you have a lot on your shoulders, you have all those wonderful children, and you and your wife have probably been married for close to 25-30 years maybe (?) if I had to guess... .that is a lot to fight for, to be extremely proud of... .so please know that we are all rooting for you, and as well praying for you and your family.

she hasn't brought up anything about yesterday... .I don't plan on it.

... .I wouldn't either, I'd let that one just burn away to ash and go down the "memory hole" (a steal from the Orwell book 1984 )... .

What do you always say... .enjoy your relationship, when there is a relationship, or something to that effect.

Yeah... .it hurt to know that she (FFw) would "ask about my feelings... what was wrong" and then flip it.  I agree the holidays will likely be interesting... .I plan on disengaging quickly from drama.

RWR set to "self protect mode"... ."steady as she goes!"

Have a great weekend with your family Brother !

Red5

[I Am Redeemed]

Hmm... .lobster for Thanksgiving... .I'm pretty sure that might be considered a sin here in the South, but it sounds really good 

How did you and your wife divide up respective family time on Christmas before your dad's passing? I know you said you haven't seen her parents in nearly three years. Did you usually spend time together with your kids and then separately with your own FOO's?

Also, be mindful that the anniversary date of the passing can be rough emotionally, especially the first one. Since that is coming in December, it's something to watch out for, including the days preceding and following.

Sometimes I think the impact of having a r/s with a pwBPD is felt the most when we get "tricked" into thinking, just for a moment, that we can relate to our partner in a "normal" way and then we run smack into the BPD wall again all of a sudden. We are reminded that our r/s is not the mutual, supportive partnership that we wish it could be- and then we see the stark contrast of what we have versus what we envisioned we would have. That can be a lonely feeling.

Not saying the pwBPD tricks us on purpose- just that we let ourselves believe, because we really want to so badly, that we can lean on this person or trust them with our feelings because they are our SO, after all, and I think most people who get married to someone operate from an expectation of being able to turn to that person for emotional support at least sometimes.

I used to have that "let down" with uBPDh. He would express a concern for how I was feeling, prod me into telling him what was wrong, and then he could not follow through with support once he got me to express my feelings.

Once, when I told him that I was having a lot of anxiety, his response was to ask me if I really knew what anxiety was or not. He asked me to define it. We then got into a circular conversation about whether or not I actually knew what anxiety was and whether or not I was correctly identifying my feelings as anxiety. I don't know if his tactic was to try to prove to me that I didn't actually know what anxiety was, therefore I could not be feeling it, but the whole thing seemed completely ridiculous and invalidating to me and the result was that I shut down the conversation and felt even more isolated emotionally.

Another thing he liked to do was to tell me "you don't feel that, you think that. That's a thought, not a feeling. As if that made any difference, first of all, and second of all, that was extremely frustrating, maddening and highly ironic coming from someone whose feelings=facts.

Even though I realized a long time ago that there was only enough room in the r/s for the floods, wildfires, hurricanes, tsunamis and earthquakes of his emotions, I still sometimes slipped up and went "fishing" for the sliver of reciprocity that I thought might possibly be there- if the stars were aligned, and it was a blue moon, and it wasn't a day ending in "y"... .sigh.

I'm glad you were able to spend time with your mother and your wife and kids for the holiday. It is a blessing. I did not get to see my kids on Turkey Day (except s2) but that's okay. I am working on plans to spend more time with them during the next month. I somehow managed to have three kids with birthdays in December, so we will be celebrating for D-almost-5, S-almost-3 (same birthday) and S-almost-6 all right before Christmas.

Prayers for you and your family FF, and blessings to you,

Redeemed

[Red5]

Sometimes I think the impact of having a r/s with a pwBPD is felt the most when we get "tricked" into thinking, just for a moment, that we can relate to our partner in a "normal" way and then we run smack into the BPD wall again all of a sudden. We are reminded that our r/s is not the mutual, supportive partnership that we wish it could be- and then we see the stark contrast of what we have versus what we envisioned we would have. That can be a lonely feeling.

yup... .

Even though I realized a long time ago that there was only enough room in the r/s for the floods, wildfires, hurricanes, tsunamis and earthquakes of his emotions, I still sometimes slipped up and went "fishing" for the sliver of reciprocity that I thought might possibly be there- if the stars were aligned, and it was a blue moon, and it wasn't a day ending in "y"... .sigh.

Me2 Redeemed!... .Me2,

[I Am Redeemed]

Hi Red!

Sorry about the loss of your dog. I lost a dog last year, s2's first pet (he was s1 then) and it was so sad. We couldn't get him to the vet in time, either.

S-then-1 called him "Go" because we would tell the dog to "go" when he got in the way (he was a big lab/german shephard mix) and it was my son's real first word. He used to look out the back window and see the dog in the yard and say "Go". After he died, s-then-1 would still look out the window for "Go" but "Go" wasn't there any more... .it was heartbreaking.

Redeemed

[empath]

I'm sorry for your loss FF, too. This is the first Thanksgiving for us without my mom - so, I went out of state to visit my sister (a bit less drama around here than at home). I knew it was going to be hard, and I really didn't want to deal with having to avoid h over the weekend. I'm sure that I could have found somewhere else to be, but it is good to be here.

H called today - he mentioned that the first holidays are hard and that he was thinking about us... .  It almost sounds like he might be okay to talk with, but I know better. He wouldn't listen to me and would rewrite what I tell him to fit into his boxes.

I also have a grief support website that had an article about planning for the holidays to make space for your grief needs. It was really good to be reminded that I need to do what is right for me and that it was okay not to be with people who aren't helpful.

[formflier]

How did you and your wife divide up respective family time on Christmas before your dad's passing? I know you said you haven't seen her parents in nearly three years. Did you usually spend time together with your kids and then separately with your own FOO's?
 

So... her parents live in same town as we do now.  So it's easy to run over there and see them.

I don't try to manage her relationship with them or my kids with them.  I kinda approach it by thinking that I don't let other's opinions of them influence my opinion of them... .so I don't try to influence others opinion of them.

From time to time my wife will get huffy about me not wanting a kid to go over there, but there is usually a reason such as "so and so didn't do their chores... so they didn't "earn" sleepover privileges or something like that.  I don't personalize it.

We do family events at our house with everyone and then they will go see other family as it works out. 

FYI:  Part of the reason that I did the "estrangement" is because my wife got an idea that I was being selfish by wanting "family" time without her family around. 

Said another way... .she claimed they were family... .just like our kids and could be at our house anytime... .no need to ask... knock... or any of that.  So... some events my wife and I had agreed would be "just us" me, wife, and our children were "ruined" because they showed up and wouldn't leave... several times.

My life is soo much simpler now.

FF

[AskingWhy]

I am so sorry about your father, FF.  

The first holidays after a loss are painful.  There are those "holes" in one's life during holidays.  

I am late for this party, but holidays and special occasions seem to bring out the best and worst in people.  In pwBPD, this gets magnified threefold:  weddings, Christmas, Thanksgiving, etc.

As most pwBPD, at various times, exhibit elements of other personality disorders, your W accusing you of using your father's death to "hijack" Thanksgiving is a lack of empathy, seen most often in NPDs.  Any "normal" person would have acknowledged your loss with empathy and an expression of that empathy. Extending sympathy to your mother would have also been appropriate.

Your considering your mother's feelings is normal.  Your wife's response is not.

BPDs "misread" emotions and then take other people's feelings as a reflection of their own.  (Sounds NPD.)  The family loss and the loss of the widow became all about your W and her feelings toward herself and the holiday.

I recall this in my husband's dysregulating when my elderly M was living in our home under hospice care.  Here was a dying, elderly woman with mild dementia weeping when she heard my H bellowing in the house.  She was ill, but actually got out of her bed, upset because she thought her presence was the cause of the argument.  (It wasn't.  H was angry at me, as usual.  I was his usual target and punching bag when he hated himself and the world.)  After he tried to assure my M that he was not angry with her, he led her back to her bedroom.  I was incredulous at what he just did and remarked to that effect.  Then he raged at me, saying, "When I am mad, I don't care who hears me!"

BPDs have no self-regulation--like an infant.  All that matters are their needs in the here and now.  

Again, a manifestation of the NPD aspect of BPD.

That is the way BPDs are.  It's all about them in the NPD aspects of BPD.

Again, FF, I am sorry for your loss.  

Red and Redeemed, I am sorry about the loss of your dogs, too.    

[formflier]

Hey guys... thanks for listening and caring. 

As I reflect a bit on this I understand that my grief is just not a smart subject to discuss with my wife, especially if she "catches" me in a soft moment and asks what's wrong (like she did this time). 

I assumed she would be able to be properly sympathetic (which is a 50/50 proposition).  What I really didn't "think through" is that I was the one that was "off" or "compromised" due to the emotion of the moment.  So... .when she "turned" on me I didn't have any spare capacity to move through that moment.

If she approached me out of the blue and asked how the estate was going or how I felt about the loss of my Father, I would likely give her a thoughtful sentence or two and move on before I got too emotional about it.

Someone suggest the "hijacking thanksgiving" was projection on her part.  I think that analysis is spot on. 

Her desire is to use the "magic BPD white board" and have me start doing things with her parents like nothing ever happened.  So... she likely understood at some level the conversation was about me and my Mom and what I should do and she put out a  seemingly nice idea "I figured we would invite your Mom" and then hijacked it by saying her parents should come too.

Anyway... .lesson learned for me.

FF

[Cat Familiar]

As I reflect a bit on this I understand that my grief is just not a smart subject to discuss with my wife, especially if she "catches" me in a soft moment and asks what's wrong (like she did this time).  

I assumed she would be able to be properly sympathetic (which is a 50/50 proposition).  What I really didn't "think through" is that I was the one that was "off" or "compromised" due to the emotion of the moment.  So... .when she "turned" on me I didn't have any spare capacity to move through that moment.

As much as we know about the limitations of our BPD loved ones, it's still so easy to get caught up in the moment and think/hope that they could behave like a "normal" person would.

The compassionate thing that any "normal" person would do, IMO, would be to have invited your mother for Thanksgiving dinner. Even "normal" people could understand that their spouse might not get along with their relatives for a variety of reasons. It doesn't seem too much to ask that potentially troublesome relatives would not be invited as a tit for tat, just because one's widowed mother received an invitation.

Off the soapbox now... .on an unrelated topic, even expecting compassion from a pwBPD sometimes seems like asking for the moon. On Monday I had two vet appointments for animals with eye issues. My 20 year old cat suddenly went blind on Thanksgiving day. I figured it was high blood pressure leading to detached retinas and it was. He was bouncing against the walls like a pinball, but he's starting to adapt and with the BP meds, it's possible that he might get a small fraction of his vision back. Fortunately he's been able to find the litter box most times and the area where he lives has tile floors.

Then in the afternoon, the equine vet came to see my young donkey. She had an acute episode of uveitis, which could lead to blindness. Fortunately it seems to be resolving well and thankfully, she lets me medicate her without having to tie her up and handle her roughly. All I need for her cooperation is a pocket full of peanuts in the shell and horse cookies.

So, I mistakenly thought I could get a bit of empathy from my husband when I told him that I was pretty upset that evening after these two eye issues. NOPE--he was just f*n clueless that I might have needed a kind word or a hug. He was grouchy and totally lost in his own issues to the point of complete lack of awareness that anyone else would need emotional support.

[formflier]

As much as we know about the limitations of our BPD loved ones, it's still so easy to get caught up in the moment and think/hope that they could behave like a "normal" person would.
 

Exactly.

Your animals are very lucky to have you caring for them.  Especially supporting a cat that way.  Really hoping that the BP meds help.

Animals are pulling at my heartstrings this year.  We've had two bunnies pass away (they seem to be fragile animals) and that was devastating for D13.  The original two bunnies are still going strong.

Currently worrying with a thoroughbred that's not wanting to keep weight on.  In fact looks like moving him indoors for a while to keep a much closer eye on him.  He doesn't seem to stand up for himself around food.

FF

[Cat Familiar]

Sorry to hear about your bunnies. It seems like sheep, bunnies and other prey animals are so vulnerable to various illnesses and sudden death.

My old cat is a role model for optimism. He lost his hearing not long ago, but he's still a happy guy. He loves to be petted and loved on. And I watched him figure out how to climb two stairs so that he could go out the kitty door and be outside. I checked on him later and he was back in his room, sleeping on his pillow. Somehow he had figured out how to get back in after he had spent enough time wandering in the garden.

It's tough to keep weight on thoroughbreds sometimes. I had an OTTB that just couldn't hang onto weight even though I put oil in his food. Later I had that issue with another horse and I found out about Cool Calories. https://www.mannapro.com/products/equine/nutritional-supplements/start-finish-cool-calories-100

What I like about Cool Calories is that it doesn't make a horse "too hot" which is important when you're dealing with a thoroughbred. I couldn't feed my guy anything with oats because he'd get so wild, he'd be unmanageable.
 

[formflier]

This is the only thoroughbred I've ever been around.  Gelding.  Tall guy.  Daughters really like riding him and he doesn't seem "hot" in disposition. 

He doesn't like treats (that just weird)

I suspect that he doesn't like to eat in a group and I bet that he recovers quickly when it's just him.

I've been around tons of horse people that have had thoroughbreds and they all describe them as the oddballs of the horse world.   Our vet really isn't concerned... says... well... .he's a thoroughbred... this is par for the course.

So... I'm trying to keep it in context and not get overly concerned.

Our long term bunnies are "mutts" without papers.  We were going to try to show pure bred bunnies for 4H.  Got two from same breeder and they both had similar issues and passed away.  So... genetics... .who knows? 

FF

[Red5]

pets... .me and my chow mix "old man" stray dog, he's fourteen now... .we take our blood pressure medication together every morning, and then again together in the evening  !

Red5

[I Am Redeemed]

Aww, Cat, sorry about your pets. Here's a hug for you   

Red, it's amazing how much our pets can have in common with us.

Regarding bunnies... .we had one once. Kids picked him out. All the different colors, and they picked the plain brown rabbit. Named him Bunny Foo Foo.

Foo Foo passed away unexpectedly and without explanation. One day he was fine, and then he wasn't.

He was a funny bunny. He liked to steal candy. Sweet tarts, nerds, even tore into a package of Kool aid once.

Oh, you want to eat a bowl of cereal? Hope you don't mind Foo Foo literally climbing up your leg and sticking his head in your bowl.

Going to sleep? Not without Foo Foo. He's totally going to jump in the middle of the bed with you.

I miss that dadgum bunny.

Redeemed

[formflier]

Himalayan rabbit

We got two of those to show.  Gorgeous animals. 

The other two are mutts.  I enjoy having them around.

FF