Bpd daughter in denial

[Postoak]

Any advice on helping a 23 year bpd who is in denial she has it. She was diagnosed with “traits of bpd” 2 years ago and has gotten worse. Seeing therapist but they are not working on CBT or DBT because she says the psychiatrist just said shes depressed. Not true. I doubt if I call they will release that information to me.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[FaithHopeLove]

Hello Postoak and welcome to the group. You have come to the right place for help and support. I am sure I speak for everyone when I say I am glad you are here. Please tell us more about your daughter, whatever you are comfortable sharing. You ask about denial. It is a defense mechanism people use when the truth is too painful to face. People with BPD often use this defense mechanism because their emotions so intense. If you confront them they tend to get even more defensive. Therefore I recommend a much softer approach. It may sound counterintuitive and it is but radical acceptance and validation may work better. I am on my phone now so it is hard to post links but if you put these terms in the "search" box a whole lot of good, clinically responsible information will appear. The fact that your daughter is in therapy is great. Has she been officially diagnosed with BPD? What about her behavior leads you to suspect she may have it? We are here for you.
Hugs
Faith

[Blueskyday]

Mine is in severe denial too. She was diagnosed as bipolar with BPD traits. I knew it was the other way around. She has never been "manic" per se. I have known people with bipolar and she was not the same. Everything she did or said she thought was classic BPD.

I have dealt with this for almost 20yrs. She has just come off her meds and suddenly I am persona non grata again.

She is so selfish and duplicitous. I know she lies to me when she really doesn't need to. Lying to me is her default mode. She was better on the meds but she became morbidly obese. This fuelled the depression but it made her a little nicer to me..Probably not a much as I had imagined.

I see no hope for our relationship as things stand .

How is she with you?