Hello everyone

[unshaken]

I'm grateful I found this board. I don't know how much longer I can cope with my BPD adult son. My days just get longer and longer as his illness gets worse and worse. The emotional abuse is starting and the acting out and the demands. He is a invisible BPD and High functioning so he is like a Dragon that comes out of his cave and blows fire and then goes back in and hides. His abandonment issues are by far worse then ever and he continue's to Hate me and us and basically everyone. It's exhausting. He has not been formally diagnosed because the only psychiatrist he has seen did not share the information because he is an adult. He refused to take the medication he was given anyway. I have done my research and I'm living proof that he has BPD. I don;t need a doctor to tell me. He fits every criteria and the book Walking on eggshells BPD, is him verbatim. I don't know where to turn but I was hoping some support would be nice. NAMI is here in my area and they are great but all the classes in the world has not helped me get my son help. Thanks for allowing me to vent here

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Roseglow]

Hi Unshaken,
Sos orry to hear of your struggles.  You are among friends here and we all know what you are feeling.  You have a very diplomatic way of talking about your son as a "dragon"...
As to where to go from here, there are so many resources on this site. You have to go into some of the tabs, but it will give you a start.  Also, the Family Connections for BPD has several webinars that will give you some background info.
You would be surprised if you goggled a few apps with "Borderline" in the title... Beyond the Borderline is one hosted by a bpd.  To hell and back is extensive;, lengthy but has some pearls.
I have ordered Marsha Linehams books and have just received the first one.  She is the expert who came up with dialectic therapy which are awesome tools for anyone to learn.
Keep in touch and remember to take time everyday for self care.