So it begins

[jefferson]

Today my daughter posted something nice on social media regarding mental illness. 
It said "never give up on someone with mental illness.  Replace the I with we and it becomes wellness"
As soon as I responded with just a heart, my phone rang. 
We had a good conversation (one of the first in months) regarding her current situation and then I believe the TRUE reason for calling was revealed. 
My husband and I assisted her ex husband with having her 2 children placed with him a couple months ago.   She completely blamed me for them being "taken" from her.  Now she is telling me that they are probably coming back in January. 
Soo, she asked if we would pay for them to get home.  They will need to fly from out of state.   Initially I told her that we had thought about helping the ex husband with this. 
I have since found out that while they have been away, the child support was not withheld and she has been taking the payments! 
Now I feel like I should not help with the cost of flights.  She hasnt had the kids at home to take care of and that money she was receiving should have been saved for this.  Instead Im sure she has been using it for her own needs and wants. 
Please give me some advice. 
Deep down I dont feel like they should be returned yet anyways.  She said she has been getting some counseling, and attending online alcohol classes but I am no fool.  I think she is only going through the steps to get her children home.  It was obvious she posted a picture from THE BAR recently.  Master manipulators right? 
UGH...

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[beatricex]

hi jefferson,
This is tough.  What I hate the most about this particular mental illness is the borderline can turn on and off the charm When They Want Something.  Agree, ugh.

It's not your job to fly the kids back to their mom, and it's also not your job to worry about her finances.

Nice that she called and was sweet, however. 

b