5 months n/c

[Depression = 72% of members]

Its been 5 months n/c and I just had to send her something bcause I haven't seen my son nor daughter since, she painted me black to my D13 and I don't like it at all ,itgives her to much destroying power. So she just kept calling me a lier on every bits and pieces that she did, not validating things she supposedly heard, that I cheated on her... .far from the truth... .Never seen her like that I was having a chat with a 3year old toddler who can type on a computer. Got one mess asking why I wrote after all that time,that I made her sad, I even rant and blamed her for the things she did and she said " oh I was well before,my T made me realized you blame me for all your sh#t and I've been honest with her, the best 75$/session I've spent ".       and somehow I don't feel better, actually, I'm somewhere else now she has gone worst and it seam I'm the only one who sees this. She is highly fonctionning, way more than me. I have been in this turmoil more than I should have been. I kept coming back for her many, many time. Getting the abuse  and dissociating it . Boy I feel like I seen her in front of me after 10 years. I really feel like shxt

[necchi]

Its been 5 months n/c and I just had to send her something bcause I haven't seen my son nor daughter since, she painted me black to my D13 and I don't like it at all ,itgives her to much destroying power. So she just kept calling me a lier on every bits and pieces that she did, not validating things she supposedly heard, that I cheated on her... .far from the truth... .Never seen her like that I was having a chat with a 3year old toddler who can type on a computer. Got one mess asking why I wrote after all that time,that I made her sad, I even rant and blamed her for the things she did and she said " oh I was well before,my T made me realized you blame me for all your sh#t and I've been honest with her, the best 75$/session I've spent ".       and somehow I don't feel better, actually, I'm somewhere else now she has gone worst and it seam I'm the only one who sees this. She is highly fonctionning, way more than me. I have been in this turmoil more than I should have been. I kept coming back for her many, many time. Getting the abuse  and dissociating it . Boy I feel like I seen her in front of me after 10 years. I really feel like shxt

[Surnia]

  marinro7

Its really tough to be separated from your children. I feel with you.

I am not totally familiar with your story - how is your situation legally? Is there anything you can do for you on the legal side? Perhaps posting on the Legal board cold be helpful too.

[necchi]

Well m'y D13 Is from a past  relation and i reintroduced her this summer to my exBPDgf wich is mother of S3 whom with she uses has she please to manipulate me, and made so my name is not on the birth certificate, although she wanted me to be. So this summer my D13 spent a lot of time with her and i left her ( this was the xth recycle we weren't living together) and the exBPDgf gas lighted the facts and has painted me black. Ironically, D13 mom got a n/c judgement against my exBPDgf 3 years ago and is no more enforcing it. I could use it against BPD ex but D13 would end up paying the price... .so anyhow I'm such in a turmoil right now that i just try to let go, i cant think straight so it is what it is

[necchi]

This was 9 days ago and the way i feel now is completely different even in such little amount of time !

i feel confident in getting back what is mine, my self-worth whatever the outcome and pain i will stir in her.

this ain't vengeance it's coming out of the abuse and staying away from it.