Why do this to myself/Im done

[Boisnix79]

Thanks to everyone for helping me on this journey... . Its been a confusing one to say the least... . Getting sucked into this madness is disheartening, frustrating and it took a good long hard loom in the mirror for me to get to this point... .

We were together for 11 months and besides the first 3-4 months this has been hell... . No support emotionally, Im the parent, its seriously been a learning experience... . But not one I would wish on anyone else... .

My real advice is to man up... . thats what I'm doing... .

Cause seriouisly, if they are mirroring us, then the real problem is with us... . I thought of my grandma who raised me and if this is really the dream she had for me when she was putting in a second round of parenting... . NO... . HELL NO.

I'm not telling you it isnt hard, or its some great insight... .

But I'll tell you this, after you understand that its not understandable... . what else is there... .

I wish you all well... . I may sign in a few weeks when im going through withdrawls to hear stories that sacre the hell out of me and ignite mt PTSD... .

NC, NC, NC. Just told her... . its been coming for a while...

This is bad for us... . pining, holding on, blah to all of it... .

Peace and harmony to all... . or at least finally for me!

[santa]

No contact is the way to do it, man. Just stick with it and you'll be feeling 100% better about all this in no time.