Do you know what she wants to get out of the discussion?
Something I learned to do over the course of my divorce was to say, "I want to think this over before I agree to anything." There are some good phrases that work as brakes. With my ex, I had to repeat specific phrases over and over and over and over again. A couple of other favorites: "No" and "Stop."
What leverage does she have?
To make this quick, we both have a pension and investements funds. If we were to split things up, I would owe her about $16,000 (the delta between half of my stuff minus half of her stuff)
my initial intention was to file for divorce via my lawyer with conditions as we are discussing right now (no reclamations). This was gonna cost me a good $3000 at least in lawyers fee if she did'nt fight back.
Then recently she sent me an e-mail saying that she didnt want anything to do with my money. That she was happy with her new guy (he seems loaded as they are buying a big new expansive $800k house) and wanted the same for me. We had a quick chat and agreed that we would file the paperwork ourselves. (she is more detail oriented than me so she will file the paperwork and I will have it checked by my lawyer before I sign anything)
So yeah she has about $16-20K leverage on me. Which seems not much but I am already $40K in debt (out of which $20k is for our wedding HAHAHAHHA! )
Only thing she asked for was for a 30 mins chat. To which I agreed once and only once all the paperwork is signed and the divorce is settled. I am hoping (... .) that all she wants is closure. Which I"ll give her. Then walk away. And go find another job in the Arctic or Antartica where I hope she will leave me the F! alone.