Depressed until Contrition

[Latojapan]

Has anyone here ever experienced your BPD spouse being or "acting" depressed after a disagreement until you display total contrition?

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[thisagain]

Welcome Latojapan 

What do you mean by acting depressed? I can't tell if you mean giving you the silent treatment and pouting around the house, or if it's something more.

Sometimes my partner will sulk and ignore me, but she'll still light up if her friend calls or something. So it's more specific to how she acts around me, rather than generally acting depressed.

Also I can't even fix that by apologizing. Even if I apologized and/or she knows it wasn't my fault, she just gets overwhelmed by her emotions and can't handle interacting with me.

[an0ught]

Hi Latojapan,

it is not unusual that pwBPD are manipulating others to act in a way to provide them the required emotional stimulus. Playing head-games is somewhat common whether conscious or often unconscious (but habitual).

There are steps you can take to stop this nonsense. A good start is reading up on the LESSONS as the skills described there are helpful implementing this change.

,

a0

[123Phoebe]

Has anyone here ever experienced your BPD spouse being or "acting" depressed after a disagreement until you display total contrition?

Hmmm, no, and I think it's because I've fought off "my" urges of walking on eggshells and enmeshment with a 10-ft pole, haha.