How to help?

[Gypsywanderer]

Hello, I have just joined this group. I have a relative who has been diagnosed with BPD.  I have read a bit about the condition and have a basic understanding of the symptoms and behaviours. My dilemma is my relative lives a long distance away and make it difficult to know exactly how she is going. She had tried to end her life numerous times and is having counselling to help. She also has bipolar and is on medication which seems to be working. The BPD seems to be the biggest thing affecting her. I have had confirmation that she is in a very unhealthy relationship involving controlling behavior and emotional abuse. I think deep down she knows that she should leave, but probably doesn't want to admit it. For now I am keeping regular contact with her to offer support, however, I know and my whole family agree that it would be best for her to leave the relationship and return home. I know this is a decision she needs to make, but my question is how can I gently and subtly get her to realise this? The last thing I want is to upset her and push her further away. Any help would be appreciated. Thanks

[Kwamina]

Hi Gypsywanderer

I am sorry to hear that all this is going on with your relative. You say she has also been diagnosed as bipolar and is receiving medication which seems to be working. That is at least some positive news. Does she as far as you know still exhibit signs of suicidal ideation?

BPD is a challenging disorder but now that she's been officially diagnosed, you at least know what you are dealing with. There are certain forms of therapy that have been proven to be effective for certain people with BPD, such as Dialectical behavior Therapy (DBT).

When was your relative diagnosed with BPD and do you feel that she truly acknowledges and accepts this diagnosis? Is she receiving any kind of targeted treatment for her BPD?

Take care and welcome to bpdfamily