EPIPHANY: Was this a recycle attempt?

[Depression = 72% of members]

My ex has a child with her ex-husband (just under 3 years old).  She claimed that he physically abused her and that he was a sociopath and/or extreme narcissist.  She once told me that she would attempt to include him in activities with herself and their child for "the sake of the child." For example, she told me that the last time he was included was on Halloween a few years ago. Logically, that makes no sense.  If somebody was horrible enough to you that you wound up in a hospital from the physical abuse, why include them in anything? Was this her attempt to recycle him after leaving him... .?

[sweet tooth]

My ex has a child with her ex-husband (just under 3 years old).  She claimed that he physically abused her and that he was a sociopath and/or extreme narcissist.  She once told me that she would attempt to include him in activities with herself and their child for "the sake of the child." For example, she told me that the last time he was included was on Halloween a few years ago. Logically, that makes no sense.  If somebody was horrible enough to you that you wound up in a hospital from the physical abuse, why include them in anything? Was this her attempt to recycle him after leaving him... .?

[JerryRG]

My exBPDgf claims I raped her, few weeks later we are engaged? Yeah it's all lies or an alternate universe, no one is safe from lies because we cannot disprove them, just look for the same patterns.

I would be one of 9 rapes and that is just not possible and I'm thinking not one is real.

[sweet tooth]

My exBPDgf claims I raped her, few weeks later we are engaged? Yeah it's all lies or an alternate universe, no one is safe from lies because we cannot disprove them, just look for the same patterns.

I would be one of 9 rapes and that is just not possible and I'm thinking not one is real.

I'm assuming that you were oblivious to the rape claim before the proposal? That is very bizarre.

It eats up my ex that the guy's new woman comes with him to divorce court. She told me, "she has no business being there." I think she wants him to be miserable or still loves him in a sick way, I don't know.

[drummerboy5]

It's not uncommon for exBPD to hold onto other exes. They keep them around for attn or when they need something. My exBPD/npd told me she hated her sons father, yet she would hangout with him and said it was for their son. I call bs. Another thing that's weird is her sons dad won't date anyone. So he's single and she would hangout at his house while dating me? Hmm

[JerryRG]

Yes I was unaware of her beliefs I attacked her, sleeping with someone who claims to have been raped is a very dangerous and foolish thing to do.

Difficult to understand what she's thinking about, I've asked this same question many times and the best answer is pwBPD are disordered and don't think like us.

I learned in Alanon to never argue with someone who's drunk, complete waste of time because they probably won't remember anything anyway. I think the same holds true for my exgf, I've seen her totally psychotic and nothing is going to be perceived by her.

[drummerboy5]

Since being on the site I've read countless guys saying their exBPD said they raped them. That is so odd and such a serious accusation. Blows my mind

[sweet tooth]

It's not uncommon for exBPD to hold onto other exes. They keep them around for attn or when they need something. My exBPD/npd told me she hated her sons father, yet she would hangout with him and said it was for their son. I call bs. Another thing that's weird is her sons dad won't date anyone. So he's single and she would hangout at his house while dating me? Hmm

Bizarre. I call BS, too. I wonder what my ex says about me. I almost wish I would hear a mild smear campaign. It would make it easier to detach.

[sweet tooth]

Yes I was unaware of her beliefs I attacked her, sleeping with someone who claims to have been raped is a very dangerous and foolish thing to do.

Difficult to understand what she's thinking about, I've asked this same question many times and the best answer is pwBPD are disordered and don't think like us.

I learned in Alanon to never argue with someone who's drunk, complete waste of time because they probably won't remember anything anyway. I think the same holds true for my exgf, I've seen her totally psychotic and nothing is going to be perceived by her.

Good point. In what way was her behavior psychotic?

[sweet tooth]

Since being on the site I've read countless guys saying their exBPD said they raped them. That is so odd and such a serious accusation. Blows my mind

Blows my mind, too. My ex acted like a rape victim. She was very squeamish well it came to sexuality, at least with me.

[JerryRG]

She accused her neighbor of wiring her bedroom to spy on her, just thermostat wires. She found a tiny wire under her bed and assumed it was a mic. She seen lights flashing in the sky while I was with her, nothing there. Talked to God and they had an actual verbal exchange, multiple suicide threats over the last 4 years. On and on, said I was the father of her sisters baby. I had another baby with another woman. Crazy things that had no basis in reality

[sweet tooth]

She accused her neighbor of wiring her bedroom to spy on her, just thermostat wires. She found a tiny wire under her bed and assumed it was a mic. She seen lights flashing in the sky while I was with her, nothing there. Talked to God and they had an actual verbal exchange, multiple suicide threats over the last 4 years. On and on, said I was the father of her sisters baby. I had another baby with another woman. Crazy things that had no basis in reality

Those sound like full blown hallucinations. Were the lights UFOs (in her mind)? She DIRECTLY spoke to God? That is very scary.

[JerryRG]

She would look up into the sky and say "did you see that?"

Nothing happened, she's very strange. She had a neighbor as a friend who she claims put something in her pop bottle, she said after drinking it she felt odd, she shows me the bottle of pop, half full and then takes a drink right in front of me.

I told her to keep it for evidence, she never brought it up again.

The last time I seen her in Nov of 2015 she told me to not take her texts serious because her phone was hacked and other people were sending messages.

She accused me of stalking her, stealing her internet, slashing her tire, tampering with her car, and constant accusations I was sleeping with dozens of women.

[sweet tooth]

She would look up into the sky and say "did you see that?"

Nothing happened, she's very strange. She had a neighbor as a friend who she claims put something in her pop bottle, she said after drinking it she felt odd, she shows me the bottle of pop, half full and then takes a drink right in front of me.

I told her to keep it for evidence, she never brought it up again.

She is disturbed and hallucinating. Sounds like she has more than BPD going on. Maybe she's a schizophrenic... .

After the epiphany I'm convinced that I will eventually be approached by my ex and I have severe mixed feelings about it.

[sweet tooth]

I'm having very bad anxiety. It's awful.

[JerryRG]

She is completely out of touch with reality and then she's ok, she takes meds to sleep, she started drinking beer before bed time to sleep and told me her doc suggested it.

And now that she's with this new bf she's healed and sane.

[JerryRG]

I get those feelings of forboding too, I reach out to others to help ground me

[JerryRG]

Maybe take a break from thinking about your ex? Try to find a distraction or relaxation? Hot bath and a good book? Interesting movie or tv, go for a walk, listen to music?

Talk to a good friend or family?

[drummerboy5]

I got accused of selling drugs! my exBPD/npd and I went out on the town one night and we were drinking and watching live music. There was a guy there that was out of place. he had a coat that looked a lil like mine. Well my alarm on my car went off so I stepped outside to turn it off and came back. I went to the rest room. After that we went outside and that guy was outside, my ex started questioning him about his coat (mine was in my car)because she thought I put drugs in it and sold him the coat. I was like what the heck? On the way home she told me not to bring guys to her house because they might steal things to sell for drugs. She then asked if I wanted to come in for sex... I said no thanks

The next day I posted on her fb of pics from that night and she deleted my comments and said people that sell drugs don't get to post on my wall... That was one crazy moment I had Two days later she asked me if I knew how to get pills because she knew people to buy them... I was like whhhh go on with that crazy stuff you accuse me and now want to sell them yourself?

[JerryRG]

Whoa drummerboy5

My exgf had back surgery and at that time hung out with some very shady characters, she left me and my son and said she was going to her friends to but their TV for $60 which was a steal. She returns with no TV and I asked why, she said she gave them the money but they refused to give up the TV. Yeah I'm thinking she bought some pain pills to make her feel better. I could go on for many hours of crazy. Lol

[drummerboy5]

Whoa Plumer39

My exgf had back surgery and at that time hung out with some very shady characters, she left me and my son and said she was going to her friends to but their TV for $60 which was a steal. She returns with no TV and I asked why, she said she gave them the money but they refused to give up the TV. Yeah I'm thinking she bought some pain pills to make her feel better. I could go on for many hours of crazy. Lol

Nothing surprises me anymore

[JerryRG]

The greatest of all!

She wants to share her story with the world!

My doctor said she's had a rough life but most was her own making. Yeah I'm not holding my breath waiting for and facts from her life story.

[sweet tooth]

Maybe take a break from thinking about your ex? Try to find a distraction or relaxation? Hot bath and a good book? Interesting movie or tv, go for a walk, listen to music?

Talk to a good friend or family?

I obsess. It's not easy for me to stop thinking about something. Even if I'm doing something that requires a lot of concentration, like a school test, those thoughts still pop into my mind.

[sweet tooth]

What Doctor... .?

[JerryRG]

My doctor at our local clinic, she used to treat my exgf so she knows her history and mental health.

[sweet tooth]

My doctor at our local clinic, she used to treat my exgf so she knows her history and mental health.

I see. That poor woman needs help.

[JerryRG]

I pleaded and begged and offered anything I could, dbt, inpatient treatment, AA, NA, Alanon, couples counceling, church, I watched our son full time for 45 days straight while she did nothing but sleep, all the while she said she would seek help

I got so wore out, she would come over late at night and try to keep me up all night when I had our son and work. She would leave and go home and sleep or whatever. She never even tried anything