Totally burnt out and depressed

[thayteacher]

A month into 6th grade our daughter changed into a violent, oppositional alien who we didn't recognize. She had never been the easiest kid but we were close and there was love and affection. Now she is 20 and I am so completely fried. We have tried almost everything money can buy but she has been resistant in a lot of ways. I feel really isolated and have been doing research. I have known about BPD because my sister has it but it hit home this week that my dd may also have it. I have been doing a lot of the parenting on my own because my husband and I have not agreed on how to deal with her and he is from another culture and doesn't know about the mental health care system here.

Recently, our daughter has moved out of 2 places because they were too noisy and I just moved her into another place and now that one isn't ok to her. She just dropped 2 classes without telling us. She is living part time at home and part time in the very expensive place I got her. She has only one friend and hardly relates to her. She stays in her room on the computer all the time. I am in total despair. I'm an older mom, tired, with my own serious medical condition. I can't sleep. I am getting help but I can't seem to shake the desperation and hopelessness I feel.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[livednlearned]

Hi thayteacher,

I'm so sorry for what brings you here  Two daughters with BPD and a husband who isn't supportive, on top of your own medical condition is a lot for one person.

What is one thing you want to change? We can walk next to you as you take one small part and look at it from all sides. There may be a path through this that is hard to see when you feel in the weeds.

Glad you found the site 

LnL