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Author Topic: S10 text to say mom isn't happy about move we watched  (Read 333 times)
bus boy
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 908


« on: January 20, 2017, 09:05:18 PM »

S10 was all excited to see suicide squad, he said most of his friends saw it so I figured okay I'll buy the DVD and we will watch it. It wasn't that bad, if I think something is not for him to see i won't let him watch it. He wanted to see dead pool, I said no. He plays halo at his mother's.  Tonight s10 text to say mom is not happy about suicide squad. S10 was very happy with my reply but I didn't want to get involved with a whole lot of texting. When s10 is with me it's my rules we follow. At his mother's home he has no chores. In my home s10 has chores. He helps set the table, clean up the dishes after a meal, he helps put the fire wood in the basement and stack it. On his next access visit I want to explain to him if daddy says it OK than its okay. I am trying to get s10 to see that I am an equal parent. His mom will try to control my access.
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Turkish
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Other
Relationship status: "Divorced"/abandoned by SO in Feb 2013; Mother with BPD, PTSD, Depression and Anxiety: RIP in 2021.
Posts: 12128


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« Reply #1 on: January 20, 2017, 10:57:54 PM »

Quote from: busboy
On his next access visit I want to explain to him if daddy says it OK than its okay.

Is this the gist of it? That she is judging you for your decisions? How are the boundaries now on a legal sense? How can she control your access at this point,  from a legal standpoint?

What you do on your time is your business.  Besides,  is not like you're letting him watch Caligula.

I know this is hard to deal with given S10's reporting to his mother.  He doesn't know any better.  He's 10.
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bus boy
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 908


« Reply #2 on: January 21, 2017, 10:18:48 AM »

Hi Turkish, Xw will be difficult in every way possible, always. This I am slowly learning. She will push everything in the court order. From a legal stand point the new order clearly states no reasonable request for access is not to be refused so on Wednesday access I requested an overnight and Xw flat refused. I said it's a reasonable request and she kept refusing and I kept pushing it and she resorted to her usual dirt and ignorance. I pushed it to see where it would go. The wording of actual access she will honour but the rest of the wording of the court order mean nothing to her.

I won't let him watch the 300 either.

He is only 10 I understand that but his mother is all he knows, she is the boss and well should be she's the parent but so am. It's only really been the last year 1/2 that I have had this much access with out Xw controlling it so if mom says no, it holds more weight than what I say. She does control and drill him. It's more of a fear than a respect. I am working on getting s10 to look at me as an equal parent and realize it ok for him to speak up and say " I want to go with daddy" he stood up to him mom a few years ago about wanting to see me but she crushed that pretty fast, s10 has been told many times by his mom " daddy always fools around, don't pay attention to what he says". I am making progress but the new order gives me lots of extra access so I'm expecting something, I just don't know what. Xw is very devious and sly, she is a paralegal so she knows how to dissect legal documents. As hard as the court tries to create a fair order she will pour over it looking for loopholes and use them to her advantage.
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