In essence was me leaving some catalyst to make her snap out of things
realistically, no. people are different, with different partners, and ideally, we all "do a little better each time", but its not as though its been very long, has it? people dont change that dramatically from relationship to relationship.
its easy though, to have that picture when youre hurting from a breakup and your self esteem is crashing. i know the feeling. i felt small, and i put her on a pedestal for a while.
it may help to remind yourself of those things you wanted her to snap out of. whether she changes them or not, or whether theyre things that are more compatible with someone else or not, they were a part of your relationship. those things, in every breakup, are the easiest part to let go of. not our problem anymore
Everyone including my therapist continues to tell me I wasn't the main issue as she'd say.
the main issue isnt either one of you; the main issue
is the issues
between you. no doubt she was difficult, and brought unique obstacles to the relationship, but you (anyone) cant really reach a good, full understanding of how the relationship broke down, and learn from it, by giving or taking all the blame. relationships, and breakups, are complex. if she walks away with a different lesson, shes not likely to be a better partner.
it may not feel like it now. but youre
both better off, both for having known each other in the time that you did, and also for breaking up when you did. thats the thing i always hated about relationships: they have an expiration date. we all get every last one of them wrong but the very last, if we even get that right.
