Hello all,
Let this be a message that shows there is a light at the end of the tunnel.
I have been divorced now since 2021 and after weathering the extinction burst and attempted recycling find myself in a stable 3 year relationship and looking to the future. With my son about to turn 18 in a few months the legal end to her involvement in my life will come to an end.
Lessons learned for me: clear boundaries are vital, avoiding JADE behaviors and staying clear of invalidation and not only useful in working with BPD but in life overall and as such I am coaching my son in the same as he navigates his mother's ebbs and flows.
Life can be better, stability is out there and taking control of yourself and letting go of any attempt to fix the other has set me on this current better path.
Great to hear. I have a longer road to go (my daughter is not yet a teenager), but do look forward to someday not having to interact with BPDxw anymore.
Learning to have clear boundaries and how to maintain them is definitely key, and important in all relationships, not just personal, but also professional. I see that failing to learn these lessons affected my career as well. Standing up for yourself and enforcing boundaries can't wait. It's something that has to be done consistently, or you just end up repeating the same scenarios over and over.
