Please help

[In4thewin]

I'm very sad and confused about what I should do and not do when it comes to mitigating issues and helping m dBPD daughter right now and moving forward. Her recent news about being pregnant has thrown me through a loop and made her need to seek help so much more urgent, but I know I can't control that. At this point I'm grappling with how to maintain physical boundaries that are necessary due to her volatile behavior while also remaining accessible and appropriately supportive. She wants me to just "be happy for her" but I don't feel happiness. What I feel is afraid and helpless with a smidgon of hope that hangs on a thread. My friend who's a nurse and professes to understand BPD thinks that I should be going NC to the point of blocking my daughter from even contacting me, but this just doesn't set right in my heart or mind. She's only 19, is legitimately in a lot of pain, and it seems cruel and downright dangerous...... but apparently that makes me codependent? Please help. I wan't to support her and be a part of my grandchild's life, but not with the tradeoff of continuing to tolerate abuse or becoming an enabler. I don't believe the pregnancy was any accident but does that even matter. Does it?

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders