I first came to BPD FAMILY 13 years ago (Oct 2013). Only recognize a few members on here from back then. I haven’t posted on here since 2019. A brief summary of my story.
-Married 18yrs had 2 sons 8 &13. Caught my wife (literally) in bed with a neighbor on FATHERS DAY 2013. Came home at night and kids were in bed with her nowhere in site, until I discovered her at neighbors.
-She abandoned myself, our sons and her family (Mom, Sister, Brother).
-She ends up with the neighbor (across the street) moves in with him and marries him. No thoughts or concerns about what Me and our sons have to deal with being that she is shaking up with neighbor.
-My sons and I go through a Literal Heal on Earth. Those early years were BRUTAL, every day felt like an ETERNITY.
-She told lies about me abusing her and our sons and other nonsense. I was abusive but she leaves the kids with me (make it make sense!!).
Please look up my posts for more details on my story and my journey to healing.
I stopped back in here to offer hope to anyone in the early stages of dealing with being hurt by a pwbpd especially if you were abandoned and lied about. My journey was very painful but coming to BPD FAMILY and learning about FOG and getting myself out of the dysfunctional cycle was life saving. I learned on these boards that I needed to go no contact to allow myself to step back and see things as they really were.
Being able to see others sharing THEIR VERY SIMILAR stories made me realize that I wasn’t alone and that I wasn’t going crazy.
Thanks to my faith in Jesus and my education on here I was able to forgive my Ex Wife wBPD and to FOCUS on my healing, my emotional health and especially raising my 2 sons who were in as much shock and pain as I was.
My life now:
-Healed and emotionally healthy. I dealt with all the pain and anger and left it in the past.
-I have a very close and open relationship with my sons now 26 & 21. We are open honest with each other and are able to talk about anything. Being in the trenches together with them as the BPD bombs were going off all around us drew us very close to each other. What parent doesn’t want that.
-Met a beautiful Christian woman (widowed) and we’ve been dating for 3+ years. She is such a blessing in my life!!
-I don’t interact with my Ex Wife wBPD much these days as our kids are now adults BUT she also benefitted from me being on here as I got to a place where I could be cordial and civil with her. TRUST ME I HAD NOTHING BUT HATE FOR HER WHEN I FIRST GOT ON HERE (check out my old posts, and my profile name says it all).
-Lastly my faith in my Heavenly Father & Savior has grown through this whole ordeal as I had to cry out to God as my whole world was crumbling around me. I can’t help but to believe that it was God that led me to this site.
My heart goes out to all the hurting men and women who are just starting out on this journey or who are still in the throes of a lifelong struggle. You all are in my thoughts and prayers. Hang in there and take it one day and even one moment at a time. There is light at the end of the tunnel!!
Sincerely MWC
Romans 8:28
