Husband and 19 yo daughter have BPD~

[Wantmoreson]

Hello Everyone,

I have always thought my husband of 24 yrs has had some mental illness. He rages over basic issues we should be able to discuss, everything is black and white, he self harms with alcohol and with people outside our home and his close family, no one would know this about him. It has create a home of discord and distrust - we have truly walked on egg shells forever. This has created a verbally abuseive home for my two teenage daughters. Enter multiple concussions and Lyme disease for my eldest and she has now done 2 stints in a Psych hospital (the last 2 wks ago) and she tried suicide a week ago via overdose. Through these last hospitalizations, we discovered that she was officially diagnosed with BPD. Now I'm dealing with a hubby who believes she is doing this all on purpose and a daughter that is cutting,  and her case wasn't handled properly after her suicide attempt and she walked out of the hospital "saying" she would go to therapy but with no serious accountablility. Oh, and let's not forget, that even though she lives with us and we pay the bills, no one will communicate with us since she's an adult. I just feel so overwhelmed!

My heart goes out to all of you out there in my same position.

Hoping our loved ones can find as much "normal" as a possible because my dreams for my daughter have seemed to have died.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[heartandwhole]

Hi Wantmoreson,



I'm very sorry to hear of your recent struggles with your husband and daughter. That is so hard to deal with, and I understand feeling overwhelmed. I certainly would feel that way in your shoes. 

I'm glad you reached out, because you've found a wonderful place for support. The members here are, or have been, in similar situations and understand what you are going through. The site also has tons of tools and resources to make things better. There IS hope, Wantmoreson. You are not alone.

How is your other daughter dealing with this?

Do you have supportive friends and/or extended family whom you can lean on right now?

Keep posting. It helps to share. We're here for you.

heartandwhole