Introduction 18yo daughter

[7babies]

I guess an intro is where to start. My seemingly happy, high achieving daughter has been dx with BPD. She is #1 in her class, homecoming queen, etc but in Sept. said she felt depressed. Family doc gave Zoloft. She got worse. Changed to Prozac and she got lots worse, thinking of suicide often. She had a crying, out of her head fit on Thanksgiving and asked to go to hospital. They changed meds again. Took her to a first counseling appt two weeks later. The counselor felt she was " lethal", called the police and she came unhinged. She fought the police, wouldn't talk for two days, was diagnosed psychotic and we were told she needed committed. She was put on Zyprexa, stabilized, came home and resumed life. She saw a counselor three tines and finally 2 months later saw a psychiatrist (last week) who do BPD from counselor report. They stopped meds and she actually seems better without them. Aside from the police incident she has had two crazy, out of her head anger episodes that ended because she was exhausted. One before a big scholarship interview and one after her dx.  Her relationships with friends are steady, no self-harm, drugs or alcohol. She does say she feels empty and thinks about suicide. Honestly, if she weren't thinking those thoughts she isn't hard to get along with. -sigh- I just want her to feel better. Sorry this is so long. We live in a very tiny town so I've spoken to no one about this.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[tristesse]

Welcome 7babies.
I'm so glad you found this site. You will find hope , advice, and comfort here.
I am so sorry to hear about the trouble your daughter is having. BPD is tough, and it can be brutal. The illness can be all consuming if we let it.
I am going to suggest that you look to the right side of the board, there are lessons and tools, they can be quite helpful and useful.
It sounded as if your daughter is not BPD who rages, or is violent, and that is great. If you can keep the lines of communication open, and you are able to sustain a decent relationship, that is fantastic.
I know you are hurting because of what your daughter is dealing with, I understand.
This site is the perfect place to come when you need to vent, or you need to find comfort and guidance. There are so many of us who BPD children, and we are all here to help one another. Please keep posting and let us know how things are going, and if you need to talk, we are here to listen. take care, and the best of luck to you.

[Kwamina]

Hi 7babies

I would like to join tristesse in welcoming you here. I am glad you are reaching out for support, dealing with a BPD child isn't easy. I am very sorry your daughter is struggling with these difficult thoughts and emotions.

Now that your daughter has been diagnosed with BPD, will she be getting targeted treatment for her issues? Are you for instance familiar with Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT)?

It's very sad and also concerning that your daughter struggles with thoughts of suicide. In September she said she was depressed, was that the very first time there was any sign that she might be having certain struggles? Has she ever expressed feeling depressed before that time?

Take care

[Bright Day Mom]

I want to join the others in welcoming you to the BPD FAM

I too have a D17 w/BPD, among other depression, anxiety, etc.  It certainly takes a toll on the entire family, but know that things can get better, particularly since you now have a dx. 

Stress can be  a HUGE trigger w/BPD and that's what seems happened with your DD. The stress of a scholarship interview then the stress / shock of hearing the BPD DX is difficult for a mature, well balanced adult, we can only begin to imagine from our sensitive child's perspective.

Let us know how we can help.

Bright Day Mom

[7babies]

Thank you all for the welcome

Hi 7babies

I would like to join tristesse in welcoming you here. I am glad you are reaching out for support, dealing with a BPD child isn't easy. I am very sorry your daughter is struggling with these difficult thoughts and emotions.

Now that your daughter has been diagnosed with BPD, will she be getting targeted treatment for her issues? Are you for instance familiar with Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT)?

It's very sad and also concerning that your daughter struggles with thoughts of suicide. In September she said she was depressed, was that the very first time there was any sign that she might be having certain struggles? Has she ever expressed feeling depressed before that time?

Take care

Up until this fall, though my dd did sometimes say she felt sad, there was no indication it was more than teen or for that matter, normal mood shifts. She did have extreme tantrums from about 18 months to 13. These decreased in frequency and just stopped. They were out of the norm but I was advised she was just strong willed. Why they stopped I don't know. The two I've seen since definitely seemed the same in grown up form. She is currently seeing a counselor and is on a DBT wait list. She saw the psychiatrist exactly once. We live very rurally and only really have access to a community mental health center 20 miles away. I gave some trepidation about the quality of care. It doesn't help that she confided in me last night she's not convinced the dx is right. Weirdly, all thus had been accompanied by gastrointestinal problems... .excessive burping, nausea, some constipation. It could be a coincidence but it is odd.

[7babies]

I want to join the others in welcoming you to the BPD FAM

I too have a D17 w/BPD, among other depression, anxiety, etc.  It certainly takes a toll on the entire family, but know that things can get better, particularly since you now have a dx. 

Stress can be  a HUGE trigger w/BPD and that's what seems happened with your DD. The stress of a scholarship interview then the stress / shock of hearing the BPD DX is difficult for a mature, well balanced adult, we can only begin to imagine from our sensitive child's perspective.

Let us know how we can help.

Bright Day Mom

Thank you for the welcome. Yes, I can trace both outbursts to stress and feeling unsure. I think the suicidal thoughts, or her telling me about them, also relate to stress.

[Gorges]

Interesting that you know note that gastrointestinal problems coincide.  I noticed that with my daughter as well.  In fact the medications make it worse and almost unbearable, so she doesn't take them.  I do wonder if diet plays a role in their emotional instability.  My daughter has had a horrible diet.  I  try to eat a "paleo" diet and it has helped with my stress and sleep, also got rid of some gastrointestinal issues.

This is a difficult age.  I just read a Time article on teen anxiety and depression.  It is at epidemic proportions thanks in large part to our
"screens".