I deflected her jealousy induction repeatedly. I think it drove her crazy can't she couldn't manipulate me in that way. I told her that being with someone was a choice and that if she wanted to leave just leave. She didn't believe me and left and then tried to recycle me. The shock of me not allowing that is still being played out in her stalking. Such arrogance. We are not toys to be played with. You're worth higher standards than that.
My ex tried the jealousy thing ALL the time, with almost anyone who was there, it didn't seem to matter. At one point I remember saying to her after she had been ignored me at a party and gone chatting to some guy who apparently had been messaging her... .I said, "I'm not going to fight for you, if you want to be with him, then leave me." This caused a huge row, and not that soon after I got the discard. Later she tried the recycle, which I refused, and again, like you, that's when the stalking started. It lasted a year. Like you say, such arrogance.
Looking back, when she felt in control of the relationship, she was a bully, and alternatively when she realised that she'd gone too far and ruined things, she'd try the pity play, and if that failed then she'd try and prevent me from moving on by stalking me.
As for normal friends, well not many of either sex tbh, I think she used her family (mother, daughters, grand children) for her social world, and I think really they were "supply" as in narcissistic supply more than anything else.