Ashamed to admit this... but I'm jealous of others continued contact.

[Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.]

Hi all,

Had to bump this as I **think** I may be receiving contact. Not sure. Wanted opinions.

Let me give some quick background. This month (July) is the two-year anniversary of my ex and I moving in together. He is HUGE on dates. They cause him to "act out" a bit. He's been self-soothing a little on FB. Mostly in reaction to posts of mine. I'm not doing anything intentionally - he is reacting to pictures, etc...   I'm blocked on FB - but he still finds ways to check up on me.

So this week I have been receiving "Restricted" calls to my home number. These calls are coming in late at night - at times that coincide with his schedule. Usually around 11:00pm - before his wife gets home. And this morning - I was awakened at 1:00am.  He keeps late hours and usually goes to bed around 1:00 or 2:00 a.m...

Opinions on whether this is contact from him? Let me add that I NEVER get calls that late and certainly not from "Restricted" numbers. This was happening with my cell phone up until April. Started in December and continued sporadically until April. The calls were in the morning and coincided with his days off / work schedule / my schedule. I never answered them. I answered the one this morning - no one there.

Why do this? Why not just send a FB message or an email? Why call my home number? So puzzling.  All opinions welcome!

Thanks!

[lipstick]

Hi all,

Had to bump this as I **think** I may be receiving contact. Not sure. Wanted opinions.

Let me give some quick background. This month (July) is the two-year anniversary of my ex and I moving in together. He is HUGE on dates. They cause him to "act out" a bit. He's been self-soothing a little on FB. Mostly in reaction to posts of mine. I'm not doing anything intentionally - he is reacting to pictures, etc...   I'm blocked on FB - but he still finds ways to check up on me.

So this week I have been receiving "Restricted" calls to my home number. These calls are coming in late at night - at times that coincide with his schedule. Usually around 11:00pm - before his wife gets home. And this morning - I was awakened at 1:00am.  He keeps late hours and usually goes to bed around 1:00 or 2:00 a.m...

Opinions on whether this is contact from him? Let me add that I NEVER get calls that late and certainly not from "Restricted" numbers. This was happening with my cell phone up until April. Started in December and continued sporadically until April. The calls were in the morning and coincided with his days off / work schedule / my schedule. I never answered them. I answered the one this morning - no one there.

Why do this? Why not just send a FB message or an email? Why call my home number? So puzzling.  All opinions welcome!

Thanks!

[myself]

Same here. Was getting Restricted calls that I didn't answer because I thought it might be her. They tapered off, and soon after she contacted me in writing. I didn't respond. Nothing since then.

[fromheeltoheal]

Mine was big on dates too.  After I left her I got a call on the anniversary of the day we met.  Then on the anniversary of the day we got together.  Then on the anniversary of the first great trip we took together.  Then on her birthday, and easy one.  These dates are months apart, I didn't answer or return any of them, and there's no way in hell they were coincidental.

It's amazing what a borderline will do to try and soothe.  I've decided that it really had nothing to do with me, she wasn't in a happy place, memories stormed her brain, she got a 'feeling', tried to reach out to see if an attachment was still there, any attachment, an inkling of the one she worked so hard at and then threw away.  Whatever.  Nothing good could come with any contact, and I haven't gotten any calls in quite a while now, my guess is she gave up and flitted off to something bright and shiny.  Hope that happens for you too lipstick.