exhausted please help

[fiercemama]

Hello.  I am so grateful to have found this forum.  I am caring for my 27 year old daughter, whose journey in this life has been more than challenging.  I've recently divorced her father when it was revealed that he is a pedophile.  He abused her (and other children).
After countless hospitalizations, she has a diagnosis of BPD.  Educating myself about BPD has helped our relationship tremendously.  My reaction to her outbursts, fierce accusations, and myriad physiological ailments has changed, and she feels less abandoned.
But here's the thing:  It is taking a physical toll on me.  I am beginning to feel like her needs are starting to smother me.  There's no place for my needs in this relationship!
I love my daughter with all my heart, but I fear I won't be able to ride this out.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[dbtmom]

I can related to your feelings of your daughter's needs taking a toll on you. This past month has been so difficult, that I decided to get a family gym membership just so I can have some time for myself (when my child has plans that take her away from our home). Going to my full-time job, run errands, or committing to plans with family/friends can be difficult because of my child's mood swings. I'm always concerned that I will get an emergency phone call from her and need to leave at a moment's notice because my child is still unable to use DBT strategies and/or emergency plan to calm down.