The Best and Worst of Times

[Shattered231]

I've been married for 3 years to my wife who has BPD. (though she wouldn't call it that and instead over-spiritualize it) A little over a year ago, we found out about BPD and were relieved to gain some understanding about the hell that had been unleashed in our marriage. However, my wife has been resistant to getting help, and so after 3 years of abuse, my nerves are fried and I am torn internally about my marriage. I love this woman and we have had the best of times. But the abuse has shattered and hardened my heart to the point of seriously considering leaving. I'm depressed and shut down. I fear saying the smallest wrong thing and awakening the demons... .I don't want to leave my family, but I don't want to continue experiencing the abuse either. I'm really losing hope that things will ever change, especially since her willingness to get help is limited. She thinks she knows what she needs, but a broken mind can's fix a broken mind. I just ordered the book, "stop walking on egg shells" and am happy to have found this community. I really need help and support. Thank you!

[PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES]

PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Turkish]

What kinds of abuse have you been experiencing? Any kids?

[Meili]

You will find a lot of people here to talk to, who will provide you with support and some good advice. We all understand - we've all been there... .experiencing the frustration and hurt.

Did something happen recently to bring you here, or was it just the culmination of things?

There are communication skills that will minimize the behavior of someone with BPD and these have proven successful for some of the members here. These skills can greatly reduce the conflict and the levels of conflict that do occur, and make things easier.

Keep posting - it is very therapeutic, and you will be greeted by so many people with circumstanced similar to your own. You will be amazed. I believe you will be greatly comforted by the support here and the fact that we really understand what you are going through. We've all been there to varying degrees. Take care of yourself. We will look out for future posts from you.