She’s Back...

[Depression = 72% of members]

After not speaking or texting for two months after our breakup (she wanted it... .I was determined to try yet again), I received a late night text message.  She told me she’s been miserable and heartbroken.  She cries all the time. She misses me and us.  (This all surprised me as I felt she was probably doing fine since I hadn’t heard from her.)

I responded gently.  I asked her what her Christmas plans were.  I did not respond to her texts about us.  I did not reciprocate at all with “I miss us, too” or “I still love you, too” texts.  I tried to engage her in general conversation.  Anyway, she kept coming back to how she’s never loved anyone like this before but she knows we cannot go back because I “evaporate” her (not sure what that means) and she can’t be vulnerable again.

Christmas Day she texted me Merry Christmas and I returned the same.  Then she emailed me more of the same about how she will always love me even though she knows we can’t be together.

I responded again with asking her how her Christmas was.  No response about that.

I still have feelings for her.  She’s a good and warm loving person.  I am holding off initiating any contact with her, but if I’m honest with myself, I do want to see her.

Lucky for me I’m having visitors for the next three weeks, so I cannot go see her during that time.  I’m hoping she doesn’t contact me again in that time and has been able to gain some strength.  But then again I know I’ll be disappointrd not to hear from her.

I’m fully aware of what’s going on here on both our ends.  But the good news is I am so much stronger and have so much more insight into her behavior from doing research on this topic.

I don’t know what will happen.  I only know I will not contact her.  I’ve been very steadfast on that point.

Time will tell... .

Thanks for listening.

[stixx44]

After not speaking or texting for two months after our breakup (she wanted it... .I was determined to try yet again), I received a late night text message.  She told me she’s been miserable and heartbroken.  She cries all the time. She misses me and us.  (This all surprised me as I felt she was probably doing fine since I hadn’t heard from her.)

I responded gently.  I asked her what her Christmas plans were.  I did not respond to her texts about us.  I did not reciprocate at all with “I miss us, too” or “I still love you, too” texts.  I tried to engage her in general conversation.  Anyway, she kept coming back to how she’s never loved anyone like this before but she knows we cannot go back because I “evaporate” her (not sure what that means) and she can’t be vulnerable again.

Christmas Day she texted me Merry Christmas and I returned the same.  Then she emailed me more of the same about how she will always love me even though she knows we can’t be together.

I responded again with asking her how her Christmas was.  No response about that.

I still have feelings for her.  She’s a good and warm loving person.  I am holding off initiating any contact with her, but if I’m honest with myself, I do want to see her.

Lucky for me I’m having visitors for the next three weeks, so I cannot go see her during that time.  I’m hoping she doesn’t contact me again in that time and has been able to gain some strength.  But then again I know I’ll be disappointrd not to hear from her.

I’m fully aware of what’s going on here on both our ends.  But the good news is I am so much stronger and have so much more insight into her behavior from doing research on this topic.

I don’t know what will happen.  I only know I will not contact her.  I’ve been very steadfast on that point.

Time will tell... .

Thanks for listening.

[Bo123]

A semi-rare event but good for you the way you handled it and plan on handling it.  Keep us updated and I wish you success under whatever terms they may be with regards to her.

[Harley Quinn]

Hi stixx44 and welcome 

It's great you found the site when you did.  Whichever way things go, you will get support here.  Are you looking to detach and move on or would you prefer to try to work on the r/s if there is a chance to?  Kudos for handling things the way you have.  Either way this is a positive.

Love and light x