Firstly, thank you NGU, Wentworth and Mutt for all your kind words. It really helps to simply get another perspective with all of this.
It seems you're connecting Norway to this. Is that for timeline purposes, or do you think there's an actual link?
Regarding the timeline unfortunately this happened previously when I opted to set my privacy on Facebook in December. It was sad to see but as soon as I closed my feed my ex started to excessively post images and wrote some very "grandeur" things about starting a new life. As I say, it was a sad moment knowing how much I wished things didn't go down this road but I knew I had to step back for the both of us.
It might be a coincidence about the Norway cover change, but somehow I have a gut feeling that it may be related - I can't be sure however. Just that she changed her albums privacy to public pretty much as soon as I updated my cover.
Correct. Although you're using your brain to come up with that. Use her brain instead. What could her thinking be?
Thats a tough one - when we first started dating I remember how quickly she wanted to set her status to "in a relationship" (a red flag I should have been wiser to). I don't get a sense she's with anyone at the moment, and the last time she reacted she didn't publicly aim anger directly at me... .its hard to explain but all of those grandeur posts and images she posted back in December seemed mainly to show everyone that she wanted to do good in the world and help people - perhaps a way to deflect self-hatred and pain? So why put our albums public again now? Deep down I think she might be reflecting on us and the past.
You asked for advice on what to do.
If she posted innocuous photos, and you want to remain out of contact, drop it. If she actually wants you back (theory #1 or #2), she'll likely do something else to get your attention. Does that sound about right?
Any chance you can simply let go of wondering why she did it, and get yourself back on track with your original plan? Separation is a tricky thing. ":)oing" separation requires us to move our minds away from wondering what's in the other person's mind. It is sometimes difficult to do that; it takes real work, but can give more peace when we're successful.
Yes that sounds about right. I won't react and will simply see if anything else happens. Things have been good otherwise... .I'm simply trying to focus my mind on other hobbies (like the holiday, photography etc.) and spending time with friends always helps a lot!
BTW, why do you want to check in? Because you want to talk to her? Or only because she did this?
Forgetting for the moment the recent Facebook photo developments, what do you want long term out of this relationship? Might you want to get back together, do you want to reach a "just friends" state where the history is appreciated but you're both off to new lives, or something else?
I agree with NGU it's speculative, I also agree with Wentworth what are your boundaries? The reasons why is secondary, I think that what is important is what do you want?
If I'm honest, I still really care about her, and from what I can tell she still speaks of me to her sister. As cliche as it sounds, I felt that the love was genuine - we shared a lot together and even once we separated we were still very close. There is a sad loss on both our sides, but I like to think that even though the relationship didn't work out in the end that maybe we could still remain close in some way - in all of my past relationships I've always managed to remain friends. I know its not going to be an easy road however.
The biggest hurdle though is that I cannot accept some of the splitting that goes on. The friendship worked quite well until I felt that emotional abuse was still coming my way. This was the reason I chose to step back, but I knew it was also a subconscious behaviour.
You said that you were blocked for years and now you're unblocked splitting doesn't happen all at once I think that you're split white.
Do you think thats the case? I always struggle with the notion of being split white as I always felt that maybe there had to be some sort of interaction for that to happen?
