I've tried to leave but for some reason or another I can't

[OnlyForward]

Hello, I'm new in the group. I am currently living with a spouse that suffers from BPD. It's been years that I've trying to leave this relationship behind but for some reason or another I  can't. It's been very difficult living with a person who has constant mood swings and is verbally agressive. I  please need advice and or someone to talk to about it. Thank you!

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[RolandOfEld]

Hi and welcome to the board! I'm sorry to hear that you've struggled for so long.

The first thing people with BPD partners often hear is "why don't you just leave them?"  Not everyone understands that love and attachment can still exist in this kind of relationship and its not so simple as that. I'm very much with you on this one.

I think our attachment to people usually has both a physical dimension (housing,  kids together, financial matters, etc) and an emotional dimension. Can you list out some of the things you think are keeping you bound to your spouse?

ROE.

[Mutt]

Hi KN,

 

Id like to join ROE and welcome you to the family. I’m sorry that you’re through you’re not alone. I’d like to echo ROE often people will look from the outside of someone else’s r/s and point out the faults  Why don’t you just leave him? It’s more complicated than that. We get it here you can share your thoughts and feelings without being judged or invalidated. Again I’d like to ask a similar question as ROE do you have kids together?