uBPD EX communicated - reaction to dating

[PianoDood]

I recently decided that I would allow myself to start dating 6 months after being discarded by my uBPD ex.  However, nothing serious.  Just going out to spend time together and start living my life again.  I had taken detachment from my ex serious, sought counseling and worked to restore my life and my sense of self.  The discard was rather sudden and left me in a very, very bad and stressful position financially... .To the point of almost winding up homeless.  Anyway, about a month ago, I met someone with whom I have much in common.  And after a couple of weeks of getting to know each other on the phone, we decided to meet for the first time.  During our first meeting/date, I took and posted a photo of us on Facebook, with her permission.  Well, apparently, my ex was viewing my Facebook page, which was very strange because when she discarded, she literally blocked me on everything... .Facebook, Instagram, cell phone.  Literally at the same time I was out on my date, my ex messaged me on Facebook messenger, private message.  I was able to ignore and block her without reading the messages.  However, she then went so far as sending me comments on a completely unrelated post I had posted months before.  Obviously she searched long enough to find a post that had a privacy setting that allowed her to comment... .She is not on my friends list, obviously, and my privacy settings don't allow her to even see most things on my page.  Somehow, she found a post from months ago and commented.  Mind you, her comment had absolutely nothing to with the post she commented on.  She simply started accusing me of seeing this person even before she discarded me, which was a lie... .I had just meet her a month prior to going on a first date... .and telling me all of the things she said she put up with in our relationship, including accusations that I was unfaithful to her, which I never was and telling me how horrible of a person she thinks I am.  That was a constant theme from her during our 12 years together.  And all of this after she discarded me brutally 6 months prior, blocked all forms of communication, never made any attempt to communicate with me for 6 months... .And then apparently had started monitoring my Facebook page after having me blicked since she discarded me.  I honestly figured I would never hear from her again.  Yet, something about learning that I was dating someone, she felt the need to contact me for the sole purpose of making false and toxic statements.  I have to admit, being contacted by her shocked me.  And just that small amount of toxic contact from her was like reliving her mental and emotional abuse all over again.  I immediately blocked her, but the toxic contact sent me into an emotional relapse for 2-3 days.  It was like being exposed to a disease again and getting sick from it.  But, I recovered quickly and  moved past it. Can someone please help me understand why she would do this 6 months after viciously discarding me?  She obviously didn't love me or she would have never done any of the horrific and abusive things she did, both during her devaluation and discard, so what would motivate her to contact me and be so toxic?  Why would she care if I'm dating someone?  She didn't love me!  So, I don't get it.  What motivated her to do this?  She even called the state online and filed a false report that I was stalking her. Which, of course they immediately knew was false once they talked to me. Why would she do something like that after not communicating with me for 6 months?

[Turkish]

Maybe she's not happy and started reminiscing, but it sounds like she's stuck on her view that you cheated on her and seeing start she saw validated her distorted thinking. I'm assuming that you deleted her comments while blocking her,  yes? She doesn't have the emotional tools to move on apparently. 

[PianoDood]

Yes, I deleted her comments and blocked her.  She was always a master at the push/pull.  Her pattern was always discard and recycle anywhere from 2 to 6 months after.  And, for years, I was so damaged by her behavior and never truly detached, so I would take her back.  But, as soon as I saw the distancing and devaluation start happening prior to her discard 6 months ago, I told myself that if she discarded again, it would be the last time.  It was destroying me.  And I have been resulted in my decision to detach and move on and be healthy.  So, maybe this time, seeing that I have not chased her, I stopped communicating and chose to detach and move on... .Seeing that I'm dating now, the realizes that she no longer holds puppet strings over me.  I don't know. 

[Turkish]

You have both the capacity and ability to move on with your life.  She has the capacity,  but not the ability and that's on her.  Her ball, her court. You've left the game.  Good for you for exercising your ability 

[PianoDood]

And, knowing just how vindictive she can be when she is angry, knowing what she was capable of when she is triggered, I too screenshots of her comments before I deleted them and blocked her.  I'm glad I did because I was able to show but them to the police when they contacted me about her false report about stalking her.  It's just stunning to me that someone can be so diregulated emotionally that they will try to destroy another human being when they are triggered.