Introduction in the form of a question

[dufzor]

Hello, How can I still be surprised by my BPD mother's behavior at my age?  

[Learning2Thrive]

Hello, How can I still be surprised by my BPD mother's behavior at my age?  

  dufzor, welcome!

Is it perhaps because you still hope for her to be normal? I did that for nearly 50 years.

Tell us a little more about you and your mother? I have a feeling you’re going to find a lot in common with us. We’re all at different stages in our healing process, but we’re here to help each other.

  L2T

[Harri]

Hi and welcome back. 

It is hard to say why but if I had to guess I would say L2T is right on the money.

Please do share more so we can support you and maybe even help.

Take care

[Turkish]

What surprised you that you had previously thought wouldn't surprise you?

[HappyChappy]

Hello, How can I still be surprised by my BPD mother's behavior at my age?  

Is it because she hides in your bedroom wardrobe and jumps out at you when you least suspect ? Or maybe that's just my BPD.

What behaviour has surprised you ?

[Learning2Thrive]

  dufzor,

It’s been a few days. How are you doing?

I really like HappyChappy’s humorous question. Sometimes, we just need to laugh at their ridiculous behavior.

But you know what? Their behavior is about them, not us. There’s no shame in wanting — and needing — a healthy mother. Children need a healthy mother. That is a normal need. But that’s not what we got.

It’s not your fault. You deserve a loving and supportive mother. 

I hope you’ll let us know how you’re doing if you want. We are here to listen and support you.

  L2T

[Woolspinner2000]

Welcome dufzor, 

Sometimes amidst the disorder that we know exists with a pwBPD, we still are shocked and surprised, I think, because we had figured it would get better. When they still act like a child I think it can be pretty normal to wonder when they'll change or if they'll ever grow out of it. It gets tiring I know.

Was there a particular behavior that surprised you recently?

Wools