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Nejalan
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« on: November 08, 2018, 12:44:30 PM »

Hi,
My daughter will be 18 in two months. In July she swallowed pills and ended in a hospital. Few days later she was transferred to the psychiatric unit for adolescents and she stayed there for two months. She was diagnosed with BPD with ADHD. So...starting school in September...in October still manageable but slowly getting worse...Now she stops going to school and she says she hates schoolmates she feels very bad in school and she wanted to do high school via exams ( this is possible in Slovenia...)... we are unable to do anything say anything...I am personally just surviving day by day and trying to live as normal as possible...sometimes I can not carry her anger towards me and this is just so hard...sometimes she is nice...I just need some help , advice...
We are going to family psychotherapy and she is attending individual therapy...I just hope we do as much as possible...stil l I want to learn more, help more ...
One day I feel positive, full of energy...but the next...I am just trying to survive . This is extremely exhausting.

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Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders
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« Reply #1 on: November 08, 2018, 05:31:20 PM »

Hello Nejalan, welcome.

I can feel the pain in your post and my heart goes out to you 

I am so sorry to hear that your daughter ended up in the hospital in July, that must have been really hard for you to deal with. She then started making progress but sadly has now got worse again and you are just about surviving day to day, do you have a support system around you?

I am pleased to hear that you are going to family psychotherapy and your daughter is doing individual therapy, that is really positive. Also, there are lots of resources on this site which you will find helpful in dealing with your daughter. I can also recommend a book, Loving Someone with Borderline Personality Disorder by Shari Manning.

Amidst all of this Nejalan, I hope that you are able to take time out for you, to look after your own self care x 
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« Reply #2 on: November 09, 2018, 06:26:54 AM »

Hi Nejalan:  I wanted to add that my daughter ended up completing high school on computers at home, and that was the best fit for her and us, and most of all, she completed school doing it that way.  She couldn't cooperate with teachers and school rules, and as a result, spend more time in the administrator's office than in classrooms.  Other kids didn't like to deal with her because even the most rebellious bad kids didn't want the trouble my daughter invited every single day.  Teachers tried to be supportive and work with her, but they're human, and lost it on her many times, which made matters worse.  Then, my daughter didn't like the special needs program they set up for her, because she had to go to classes with downs syndrome kids and she is extremely bright, so that was a mess...all in all...the public school system really wasn't a good fit for my daughter, and we just wanted to see her get through school so that she could move into a future...whatever worked at the time...and glad we did it that way.
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