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Author Topic: Personal Discord  (Read 5218 times)
Forgiveness
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Gay, lesb
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 108



« on: February 08, 2019, 04:14:13 PM »

I just read this article. It's super long and academic, but I think I understand that it says people with BPD have a harder time when they're in close social contact with someone, as in a romantic relationship.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4993692/

I have wondered if pwBPD are less impulsive and more regulated when they are single. Maybe they crave relationships but really do better without them. Or maybe this is just what I want to think in order to feel better about my recent break-up.

What do you think?
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SuperDaddy
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Posts: 2

Past wives:OCD/BPD, HPD, BPD. Current:BPD/PD/PTSD


« Reply #1 on: December 15, 2025, 03:00:36 PM »

Usually yes, but it depends on the context.

While not being within an intimate relationship, they won't have anyone to strongly trigger their wounds and no one to whom direct their emotions and create conflict with, which then may result in greater stability. On the other hand, the lack of having someone to care for them may make them struggle with loneliness and feelings of unworthiness.

I believe that for someone who is deeply affected, the most stable setup is to live by themselves while still having people who can provide support on demand at a close reach, given that those supporters will never get personal, even if attacked. That may be unrealistic, but there is one setup that is close enough to this. It is a psychiatric hospital that has a private room for the patient. Not a life-time recommendation, but might be the best route when things really go awry. And the controlled/balanced hospital food may also be beneficial, IMHO.

There is a renown psychiatrist in Brazil named Ana Beatriz who explicitly asks her BPD patients to remain single for the length of their recovery, so that together they (patient and therapist) can find out her real identity, preferences and desires. I believe that being stable is also one of the reasons why she asks for this. Here is one of her videos on BPD topic:

https://youtu.be/Wrmb5zteFAI
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