Small step

[Oxo]

Through reading walking on eggshells and joining this group. I made a small (but for me huge step tonight). I realised just how much I have lost contact with friends , going out and given up being me.Having no one to share it with forgive me for being excited and sharing it on here. I went out by myself to a music venue and did not feel guilty, yes it took a lot of energy and started to think about avoiding going and just to sit in by myself but I forced myself to go.

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[SunandMoon]

Good for you, Oxo! 

Taking care of ourselves, doing things we enjoy, connecting to others, and remembering who we are - all healthy behaviours and essential for people dealing with these difficult relationships.

Another bonus - self confidence! It makes us more attractive to people (including pwBPD)!

[Harri]

That is great to hear Oxo and I agree that it is a huge step!   

I second everything Sunandmoon said too!  heh

Isolation is the worst thing you can do.  Keep pushing yourself (within reason) and reaching out to friends.  Plus you have us here as well!   

[Oxo]

Thanks . Never really used internet forums much but as my wife's behaviour to me has changed over the last 3 years I have become increasingly isolated. I've felt guilty making contact with people including my grown up kids. I started to keep my phone on silent so I didn't have phone calls when she was there. I could feel her resentment and looks of anger if people did call including our kids and usually ended in a rage over some small thing that was totally disproportionate. I've almost stopped using things like Facebook . I've changed so much it's frightening if I really look at myself. So yes being on here is a real lifeline .