If she is NPD, as I suspect, then I may be in for some trouble.

[RomanticFool]

So my recent ex turned nasty tonight. When I wouldn't accept her desire to reconnect and jump through her hoops she accused me of abuse. It's not the first time she has made these accusations and threatened to do all manner of awful things to me but because we haven't been in contact I am now less inclined to put up with it. She wants to run a narrative that everything that has gone wrong in the relationship is solely down to my behaviour and she is on the receiving end of my bad behaviour. When I pointed out several instances to the contrary she lost the plot and told me that her neighbours have witnessed me abusing her, which is laughable as her daughter had to prise her off me the last time she attacked me. I decided to disengage with the accusations and she ranted for a couple of hours calling me "Epstein" and threatening to get her lawyers involved. All things she has threatened in the past and never followed through on. It seems the thing that is upsetting her the most is that I won't take 100% of the blame for everything. Whatever emotional dysregulation has triggered her tonight in particular, I have not reacted angrily or done anything to inflame the situation. I intend to let her calm down and over the next few days agree that we block each other to avoid further unpleasantness. If she is NPD, as I suspect, then I may be in for some trouble.

[Skip]

When I wouldn't accept her desire to reconnect and jump through her hoops she accused me of abuse.

You have been wanting another chance with her.

What did she want you to do?

[AskingWhy]

If you have not already done so, please read the book by lawyer/social worker Bill Eddy, "Splitting: Protecting Yourself While Divorcing Someone with Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorder."

BPDs who are high functioning often have a large amount of NPD traits.

You can buy this online and also buy a digital copy.  pwBPD are the first to scream abuse when they themselves are the perpetrators.  

Arm yourself with knowledge.  Accusations of abuse are common with BPDs.

[RomanticFool]

I’ve only just seen these replies. Apologies for the late replies. I think she wanted me to chase her. I don’t have the stomach anymore. I will check out the book.