Hi Skittles! Welcome!

Getting a person with BPD (or any type of addiction or disorder, really) into therapy can be a thorny issue. We have an article on that very topic here:
https://bpdfamily.com/content/how-to-get-borderline-into-therapyAlso, if you haven't already, I'd recommend you not mention BPD to them. As a general rule, it doesn't tend to go well when a loved one suggests BPD as a possibility. Better to come from a professional.
Whether your spouse agrees to seek help or not, though, there are tools and skills we have here that can help you.
If you feel up to it, I hope you'll share a bit more about your story. How long have you been married? What sorts of symptoms does your spouse show?
Again, welcome!