So sad

[How to communicate after a contentious divorce...]

How can I feel confident proceeding with divorce knowing that I wont be able to protect our son?

[Miss Molly 2021]

How can I feel confident proceeding with divorce knowing that I wont be able to protect our son?

[SinisterComplex]

First, welcome.  I am truly sorry that you have to go through an unfortunate circumstance. When kids are involved it is going to be difficult but not impossible. You still have to make the right decision for you. Your son needs to see you happy to. I am currently helping one of my close friends through a similar situation. Most important...please provide more background if you could. Know that you will find a lot of help and support here. One thing I will say...I am not of the mind that you stay just for the kids though. You can only do what you can as a parent. Be your best self. Be confident knowing you are making the right decision for you. It will not be easy, but you will get through it. Please continue to post and I promise you will see a very welcoming and helpful community here. We are all here for you.

Cheers and best wishes!

-SC-

[Lucky Jim]

Hey Miss Molly, Welcome!  I like to think that I demonstrated to our children that one need not remain in an abusive relationship, and that change is possible in life.  I hung on for years in a failed marriage to my BPDxW in an effort to protect the kids, but eventually concluded that I was setting the wrong example by leading, as Thoreau put it, "a life of quiet desperation."  I also determined that the kids would benefit from less conflict at home.  It was gut-wrenching to be apart from the kids when I separated from my Ex, but I never considered returning after experiencing freedom from abuse.

LuckyJim