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Skills we were never taught
98
A 3 Minute Lesson
on Ending Conflict
Communication Skills-
Don't Be Invalidating
Listen with Empathy -
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Setting Boundaries
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Author Topic: MOVED: BDP Wife checked-out and left for another emotional affair  (Read 49 times)
wendydarling
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Relationship status: Mother
Posts: 2672



« on: March 27, 2021, 02:02:53 PM »

Staff only

Hope you don't mind but I've relocated this thread to another board. It should receive a better response at "Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup". Here is the link: https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=348763.0

I have temporarily placed a ">" in the title so that other moderators will know that it has been moved and we don't move it again.

Each of the boards has a unique culture. Descriptions of which members/topics best fit each board are contained in the "DIRECTORY".  Additionally, the charter of each board is contained in the "WHO SHOULD POST ON THIS BOARD?" thread that is pinned at the top of each board.


If you think this move should be reconsidered, please send me a personal message, via "Pvt mail". I'm happy to work with you to get it to the board that makes sense for all.
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Be kind, always and all ways ~ my BPD daughter
Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders
Hope 2021

Online Online

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Family other
Relationship status: Forced Separated
Posts: 7


« Reply #1 on: March 27, 2021, 02:36:31 PM »

Thank Wendy!  Looking forward to the feedback.  Appreciate your help on this.
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Hope 2021

Online Online

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Family other
Relationship status: Forced Separated
Posts: 7


« Reply #2 on: April 08, 2021, 07:41:56 AM »

Wendy, I have no replies so far.....  really need help - My wife is in a dark place not thinking about consequences and is completely ignoring everything that she did as she had a good reason to do it without remorse.   I know this is not her, but everyday that passes, I'm feeling more lost than before....  I know things will never be the same, but the fact that she is not showing any remorse, empathy or guilt is killing me inside.  Everything that I have done for my wife for the last 20 years is irrelevant to her and she is making herself believe that what she is doing is for her to be happy.   My job in life was to make her happy.... I'm lost for words and even after forgiving her for the past, she continues to reach these critical times in her life that prevents her from see the reality of the entire relationship and the sacrifices that we have made.   I don't know what else to do....  I am moving to Myrtle Beach with the 15-year daughter, which I do hate to separate her from my wife, but my daughter deserves to be in a stable home.   I know I am doing the right thing, but I still feel terrible about it.   I don't want my daughter to hate me for doing this.    I could stay in the area, but I can't find the strength to witness her behavior since I am still in love with my wife.   Am I blind and not willing to accept that she is moving on?   Part of me still says that she loves me but her unwillingness to accept responsibility for her actions and accept that she really messed up the marriage, makes me believes that she created a wall from reality and what she think is right....  I can't stop thinking about losing her. 
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