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Skills we were never taught
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A 3 Minute Lesson
on Ending Conflict
Communication Skills-
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Setting Boundaries
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Author Topic: living arrangmements  (Read 631 times)
M71rssaia
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Relationship status: married
Posts: 1


« on: November 23, 2022, 08:54:02 AM »

Hello,
My son was recently diagnosed with BPD.  He has been in and out of hospital programs since Feb 21.  In June, he went into a residential program for about 40 days in California.  From there he moved to an assistive living home/sober house.  When we tried to set some limits for ourselves who live on the East Coast. he was hospitalized again.
Anyway, I am wondering what living arrangements look like for someone who has BPD.  Our son is 24 and has previously lived with us prior to his treatment.  I am thinking that he will need to be in some supportive living when he is scheduled to leave the sober house in FEb.  The amazing think about all this is that he stayed in California all this time despite being really attached from us and needing us to be with him when he was home.  We are able to go visit him every 4-6 weeks. But won't be able to visit him until after the new year when flights go down. 
Another question I have is do people with BPD qualify for SSI?   And what happens when he is 26 and gets kicked off our insurance which is really good?
Thanks,
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Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders
guiltymom

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Relationship status: living apart
Posts: 23


« Reply #1 on: November 25, 2022, 03:04:47 PM »

I'm curious about the SSI question too. My son is also 25; he always finds a new job but never stays at it for more than six months. My husband and I are almost totally financially supporting him (paying his rent, car insurance, phone, etc.). I wonder if my son will ever be fully independent of us. The grief for what I had always envisioned for him is so hard, so I just try not to dwell on it.
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HopefulFather

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Relationship status: Married
Posts: 5


« Reply #2 on: November 28, 2022, 07:31:00 PM »

I apologize I don't have any technical knowledge on the subject of SSI, but we have considered something like this for our daughter as well.  What we have been told by a close family friend who works in the welfare system is that it is more difficult to qualify for benefits based on "personality disorders" than it is other mental health diagnosis like bipolar disorder, etc.  The starting point is definitely a diagnosis by a mental health professional preferably a Psychiatrist along with a written note that the person cannot work or hold down a steady job etc.
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kells76
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner’s ex
Posts: 3446



« Reply #3 on: November 30, 2022, 09:58:02 AM »

Hi Marissa71, I want to join the others in welcoming you here. While the person in my life with BPD isn't a child, I did remember we have a brief thread on "Does BPD qualify as a Disability under social security?" over in our FAQ section. One post does mention

...In my work, I have seen folks get approved for mental illnesses, but it is a hard thing and they must have the backup of a doctor and a psychiatrist and oftentimes an attorney who specializes in getting people on disability.

Hope that helps as a starter;

kells76
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