Relevant history
https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=326036.0;allSo... my wife had "assured" me after I didn't "rescue" that she already had this covered and my refusal didn't matter.
It appears that "she was sure" she could "make" my oldest daughter do it and perhaps rope some of her family into it as well. Apparently there was pushback.
Instead of leaving yesterday, my wife and kids (that were going on trip) stayed an extra night, got up early and headed off to the church commitment they had made.
Today... .very proud of my daughter. And... frankly... proud of my wife as well. She made a commitment and honored it, even when it became inconvenient.
Boundaries work... FF