Diagnosis + Treatment
The Big Picture
Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde? [ Video ]
Five Dimensions of Human Personality
Think It's BPD but How Can I Know?
DSM Criteria for Personality Disorders
Treatment of BPD [ Video ]
Getting a Loved One Into Therapy
Top 50 Questions Members Ask
Home page
Forum
List of discussion groups
Making a first post
Find last post
Discussion group guidelines
Tips
Romantic relationship in or near breakup
Child (adult or adolescent) with BPD
Sibling or Parent with BPD
Boyfriend/Girlfriend with BPD
Partner or Spouse with BPD
Surviving a Failed Romantic Relationship
Tools
Wisemind
Ending conflict (3 minute lesson)
Listen with Empathy
Don't Be Invalidating
Setting boundaries
On-line CBT
Book reviews
Member workshops
About
Mission and Purpose
Website Policies
Membership Eligibility
Please Donate
May 16, 2024, 12:50:03 PM
Welcome,
Guest
. Please
login
or
register
.
1 Hour
5 Hours
1 Day
1 Week
Forever
Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins:
Kells76
,
Once Removed
,
Turkish
Senior Ambassadors:
Cat Familiar
,
EyesUp
,
SinisterComplex
Help!
Boards
Please Donate
Login to Post
New?--Click here to register
Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.
Practicing lawyer, Senior Family Mediator, and former Licensed Clinical Social Worker with twelve years’ experience and an expert on navigating the Family Court process.
222
BPDFamily.com
>
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
>
Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting
> Topic:
My GAL is calling all parties to his office to try and settle out of Court.
Pages: [
1
]
Go Down
« previous
next »
Print
Author
Topic: My GAL is calling all parties to his office to try and settle out of Court. (Read 364 times)
Mika1739
Offline
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 30
My GAL is calling all parties to his office to try and settle out of Court.
«
on:
January 14, 2017, 03:54:32 PM »
Anybody have experience with this? I have learned that a GAL really doesn't get too involved, it seems like he just wants my case off his plate.
Logged
livednlearned
Retired Staff
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Family other
Relationship status: Married
Posts: 12765
Re: My GAL is calling all parties to his office to try and settle out of Court.
«
Reply #1 on:
January 17, 2017, 11:08:37 AM »
Sounds very sketchy to me!
I know that parenting coordinators were given an extension of judicial duties in some states (usually through an order from the judge, per state laws) and that in some states, this was rolled back because people with no training in trying cases suddenly had a boatload of authority to determine difficult custody cases. And many of these PCs were lawyers or psychologists with Phds. It was a way to get high-conflict cases out of family law court, which you would think is what family law court is supposed to be for
It seems completely bizarre that a GAL, who in some states doesn't need advanced training and is often a volunteer, could try to settle a high-conflict custody case.
I would be wary! What does your lawyer say?
If it was someone who was not going to testify in your case, I wouldn't be as concerned. If this is someone who has the potential to sway your case, then perhaps have your lawyer attend, or get advice about the best way to
not
participate.
Logged
Breathe.
ForeverDad
Retired Staff
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: separated 2005 then divorced
Posts: 18169
You can't reason with the Voice of Unreason...
Re: My GAL is calling all parties to his office to try and settle out of Court.
«
Reply #2 on:
January 17, 2017, 12:19:28 PM »
My GAL - our son's lawyer - had a meeting, presumably joint, with lawyers at court when court was to hear my petition for custody, I had already gotten the green light in Change of Circumstances months earlier. Then she came to me and my lawyer separately discussing the case. She was rather frank, having no quibble about me getting custody. However she wanted to keep the equal time so Ex could get child support. She 'hoped' me getting custody was enough to reduce the conflict.
We settled with the main judge according to the GAL's wishes because my lawyer said that if either of us diagreed, then court would most likely go with GAL's wishes anyway.
Me having custody with equal time didn't work. Nothing changed except the paper saying I had custody. I went back to court for majority time the next year. We had the same GAL again and this second time she agreed but wanted Ex to get TWO evenings during each week. Fortunately the decision was for just one after school to 8 pm per week but my majority time was just for the school year, magistrate gave Ex "one more try" so summer break stayed equal.
As for your case, yes, a lot depends on your GAL's qualification and experience for this task. You can cite the aspects of any proposal that are unacceptable and why. (This is mostly for the GAL, your Ex won't agree of course and Ex's lawyer is not working for you either.) While you don't have to give in to unreasonable demands by your Ex, you should express your perspective with reasons and cautions, so the GAL knows you are being reasonable but are concerned about Ex's parenting perceptions and behaviors. Maybe no agreement can be reached without the GAL declaring his/her own parameters/recommendations if it goes to a court hearing or trial. (One benefit of a hearing is that your lawyer can question Ex on the stand and have you testify - put on the record - why you have concerns based on past incidents and obstructions that give basis to concerns about the needed contents in future order(s).)
Logged
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?
Pages: [
1
]
Go Up
Print
BPDFamily.com
>
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
>
Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting
> Topic:
My GAL is calling all parties to his office to try and settle out of Court.
« previous
next »
Jump to:
Please select a destination:
-----------------------------
Help Desk
-----------------------------
===> Open board
-----------------------------
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
-----------------------------
=> Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup
=> Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting
=> Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship
-----------------------------
Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD
-----------------------------
=> Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD
=> Parent, Sibling, or In-law Suffering from BPD
-----------------------------
Community Built Knowledge Base
-----------------------------
=> Library: Psychology questions and answers
=> Library: Tools and skills workshops
=> Library: Book Club, previews and discussions
=> Library: Video, audio, and pdfs
=> Library: Content to critique for possible feature articles
=> Library: BPDFamily research surveys
Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife
Loading...