I believe the judge may have worded the order as such to allow your XW some room to compromise. Doesn't seem likely for her to compromise. All you may do now is keep a record of your requests and her responses. When you go to court next time, ask for definite orders that meet your needs as well as s10's . That may call for more planning on your part.
To paraphrase,
I believe the judge may have worded the order as such to allow your XW some room to... .show whether she will be "reasonable" when faced with "reasonable" requests. In other words, room to comply or reject/obstruct. Now that may be overly hopeful thinking, maybe the judge really believes just telling her to be reasonable will work. Or he's tightening a 'noose' a little to see what happens. I guess you won't know until you're back in court and report what's really been happening.
While I don't know your work schedule, it does seem that split weekends aren't common. Do you get every weekend split? I ask because one reason full weekends (whether on or off) work is they allow the parent to plan activities that take the entire weekend, out of town trips to recreational sites, family events, sleepovers, etc and not have in the back of their minds, "okay, I have to be back in time for the exchange".
Were there any ordered conditions for reasonable requests? Do you have to exchange an equivalent amount of time, that is, try to trade? I suspect not because it says "extra access". Do you have to give a reason such as to take him to a movie, watch a ball game, some event or activity with his friends, etc?
As Ananass wrote, document your polite requests and the responses. If by email or text then save copies. Phone requests are harder to document because many courts don't have a history of allocating the time or willingness to listen.
