Daughter In Hospital

[Louski]

I haven’t posted in a while. We were all set to start weekly trips to a city a few hours away for outpatient DBT. Then Covid cane and life has been hell. The worst thing is I have started getting depressed myself because of all the turmoil with Covid and I simply don’t have the mental capacity to be my daughters dumping ground. So tonight she took a bunch of my antidepressants in front of me happened so quickly I didn’t even realize. So my son called 911 and she’s in emergency I will go up there in a bit and see if they will let me in to see her.
I hope they admit her to psych unit for a while. I need a break. I don’t know if we are going to get through Covid. My dais so miserable if she ends up taking her own life soon I don’t blame her I can’t imagine hating myself and my life as much as she does and she has never gotten the help she needs it’s been a nightmare since she was 13 and there is nothing we haven’t tried. Finally we saw a light for her with DBT then Covid came

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Panda39]

Louski,

I'm sorry to hear about how rough things have been and your daughter's suicide attempt.  Covid is making so many things so much more difficult and complicated...I hear you on that!

I hope you are getting a bit of a breather from the stresses you are experiencing with your daughter and that she is recovering well at the hospital.

 

Hang in there,
Panda39

[livednlearned]

Hello Louiski, were you able to see her in the ER? Or maybe they admitted her?

It says a lot about your strength that you can identify your own depression. There have been times in my life where I thought stress and anxiety were normal and didn't even recognize I was experiencing depression. And when I did, I'm embarrassed to say I didn't fully grasp what that meant, how it impacted my thinking.

Is this your daughter's first trip to the ER?

It sounds like she was willing to try out patient DBT. Does she accept her diagnosis?

[Jen2020]

Louski,

My daughter is in her first year of college and was recently taken by her college to an intensive inpatient program for self harm and attempting suicide.  Long history of emotional rollercoaster and second time in inpatient.  I had hoped that a clean start at college would help her.  Naive in retrospect.  Anyway, she was released on Monday with a handful of pill bottles and is still self harming, discussing suicide and overwhelming anxiety.  I am currently trying to get her back into the intensive inpatient while I work on getting her admitted to Sierra Tuscon where they have a BPD focused treatment plan.  She wants to go.  After interview with admissions counselor, they feel she needs to be in their highest semi-acute care program.  I am telling you this a) to share how someone else is navigating a similar process, and b) to let you know that if she is willing and would benefit from a longer term (1-2mo) residential treatment for BPD as opposed to be isolated in an environment that triggers her, I advise you to arrange a door-to-door transfer.  Wherever the ER send her to will likely not have the time and resources to diagnose her properly and will probably want to discharge he as soon as she says she is not thinking of killing herself - be it true or not.  Once that place summarily discharges her after 4-7 days, it will be hugely difficult to get insurance to approve a more focused/personalized residential as she would then have a psychiatrist saying she does not require such.

I wish you the best - and while I am just figuring this out myself, I am more than happy to share my struggles and learnings if you have any question that I may or may not be able to answer.  One day at a time.

[Louski]

Thank you Panda and lnl for support it means so much!
Thank you for sharing Jen,
Wow you and your girl have been through similar chaos:(
My daughter was admitted into psychiatric unit today after a horrible night in the ER. I think nurses should learn about empathy and validation in school. Not every kid who attempts suicide are just looking for attention some are struggling with REAL debilitating emotional difficulties.
She wanted to come home and I wanted to bring her home because she realizes she made a mistake but it’s too late. When I talked to her before they transferred her to psych we were told I could talk to her regular psychiatrist to get a second opinion to have her released but we didn’t get that chance because he never came. In the meantime my daughter was beside herself just so upset about being treated so poorly in ER just like last time and I was bound and determined to get her out.
Anyway I haven’t been able to talk to her since before they moved her to psych and I know she must have been having an epic meltdown about having to go there so it’s pretty obvious she did or said something disturbing because the psych ward won’t let me talk to her. They said they will ask her in the morning if she is willing to share the information about what went on today and if she does the nurse will call me to explain. Also said she can’t talk to me because she doesn’t have phone privileges at this time and that will be revisited in the morning. This is very hard. My daughter is an adult now so there is no messing around in psych. I don’t know what will happen to her now. I know she is addicted to marijuana so will be going through severe withdrawal that will make emotional dysregulation even worse.
I don’t get a lot of support from my husband he is so negative thinks this is the worst thing that could have ever happened. I hope and pray she doesn’t come come and kill herself. I hope something good can come out of this.