Don't listen to the apologists... .most of them are pathetic humans.
Hi thirdeye,
The anger is part of grieving - there is no reason to stiffle it.
The comments are about co-rumination. Simply put, there are healthy support group activities and not so healthy ones. Co-rumination is the latter - especially if its our primary focus.
We want to channel the anger in a healthy way or at least not get into unhealthy territory.
Here is what the American Psychological Association says about it... .
Spending too much time talking about problems can actually make things worse.
Social isolation increases your risk of depression. But according to psychologist Amanda Rose, PhD, so can the wrong kind of friendships.
In her research, Rose has found that friendships that are overly focused on discussing problems [immersing ourselves in negativity] may actually increase depression and other problems in girls... .
They found that co-rumination made girls feel closer to their friends. However, they also found that co-rumination increased depression and anxiety. That in turn led to more co-rumination.
Girls may see discussing problems as a way to give and seek support, says Rose. Instead, the conversations seem to make them more depressed. Those feelings of depression and anxiety then led to more co-rumination.It makes sense to express feelings, talk about it. Dissect it. Work through it.
"Lets all lists how our exes sucked, is injury immersion, is not a good idea.
And, calling members names, is also on that list of "not too healthy".
We're a family here. We help each other.
