I just can't do this. Please, any coping strategies that have helped you, please share.
-Oz
Oz,
Coping strategies, what did I do... .I "compartmentalized" things, I lived in the here and the now, one day at a time, sometimes down to an hour at a time.
As Cat says, you have to take it step by step, practice "self soothing"... .I used to run around the sea wall in Japan, during my first divorce, physical exercise is a great way to calm yourself, I also used to go for long and fast paced walks, I spent a lot of time outside... .these days, I immerse myself in my work, I go down to the water, and watch the boats and seagulls with my Son... .I try to stay as busy as I can so that when it comes time to sleep I am able to.
You have to let go of the past, its gone now, the more you think about that past wrongs, fights, and events, you will taint the present, and you can certainly not really control your wife, her actions, or what may come tomorrow or the next day.
Do not let yourself sink into dissociative thinking or worrying... .this will only make your here and now worse.
Give your mind a break, go to the movies, go to the coffee shop as Cat says, get out in the public, around other people... .ie' the mall or something... .take good care of yourself, and try to put distance between yourself and what has happened.
Hang in there, hang tough, like I said, and as well Cat, it may come down to just getting from one hour to the next, then one day to the next, small steps.
We are here and listening Oz, hang in there, v/r Red5