Ouch. How did it turn out? I do know those situation where you feel doomed no matter what you do (or don't do)... .I think Christmas is heavy for everyone with any sort of mental problems (or alcoholic parents) or such. I hope it turned out well.
Feeling the doom still. He got up from his nap and I politely asked him when he'd like to help me with dinner, he responded with "well it's too late now. Maybe if I had emotional support from you in the last 24 hours I'd feel like helping." I just stood there with my mouth wide open, catching flies. I was flabbergasted to say the least at this comment. I ended up making leftover soup I had frozen a week ago. I had everything laid out on the table, told him dinner was ready, he grabbed everything and shut himself in our bedroom, which I'm not allowed in at the moment. Again, just sat there, mouth open in complete shock, forced myself to eat. I hate eating alone, he knows it. I like our dinner time to just enjoy each other and chat about the day. Never had that as a kid, I attempt to break that cycle I guess you could say. Happened again today too actually but at least he can't get mad at me for not cooking. I cook, I tell him it's ready, its his fault if he doesn't eat it or it gets cold. I'm pretty sure he's feeling some abandonment from his family. I am very sure he is projecting the perceived emotional abandonment. I know, in our good times, he apologizes for not being there for me enough and he hates that I have to do everything due to his terrible panic attacks. I just think this guilt is making him project it on to me cause hey, gotta blame someone. All I know is I'm staying out of his way for now. Kitty and I are holed up on the couch with our heating blanket, he's snoring loudly in a furry puddle at my feet, I'm alternating between research and solitaire. All is quiet for now. I'll take what I can get.